The relationship lurched up and down for five years.
Redse hated living in his sparsely furnished Woodside house.
Jobs had hired a hip young couple, who had once worked at Chez Panisse,
as housekeepers and vegetarian cooks, and they made her feel like an interloper.
She would occasionally move out to an apartment of her own in Palo Alto,
especially after one of her torrential arguments with Jobs.
"Neglect is a form of abuse," she once scrawled on the wall of the hallway to their bedroom.
She was entranced by him, but she was also baffled by how uncaring he could be.
She would later recall how incredibly painful it was to be in love with someone so self- centered.
Caring deeply about someone who seemed incapable of caring was a particular kind of hell that she wouldn't wish on anyone, she said.
They were different in so many ways.
"On the spectrum of cruel to kind, they are close to the opposite poles," Hertzfeld later said.
Redse's kindness was manifest in ways large and small; she always gave money to street people,
she volunteered to help those who (like her father) were afflicted with mental illness,
and she took care to make Lisa and even Chrisann feel comfortable with her.
More than anyone, she helped persuade Jobs to spend more time with Lisa.
But she lacked Jobs's ambition and drive.