35 Ugly Baby
35 丑陋的婴儿
A cowboy sits down on a shuttle next to a mother holding her new baby. Proudly showing off her baby, she turned to her companion who'd just sat down next to her.
一个牛仔坐在一架定期往返的班机上，他旁边是一个抱着新生婴儿的母亲。为了炫耀她的孩子，这位母亲转过来把孩子对着刚坐在她旁边的同伴。
“Excuse me, ma'am,” said the cowboy. “I don't mean to offend you, but that is the ugliest baby I've ever seen in my whole lifetime.”
“很抱歉，女士，”这个牛仔说，“我无意冒犯你，但这确实是我一辈子看到的最难看的孩子了。”

The mother was uncertain she'd heard correctly, so she asked, “Beg your pardon?”
这位母亲不确定自己听到的是不是真的，于是她问，“对不起，你说什么？”
“I mean I've seen bad before, but this one's a real killer.” answered the cowboy.
“我的意思是说我以前看过不好看的孩子，但这孩子却是真正的难看。”这个牛仔回答说。
Angered at the rudeness, the woman started crying aloud.
这名母亲对他的粗鲁非常生气，她大声地哭起来。
“I'm going to file a lawsuit against this airline and everyone who is on this aircraft. How dare someone insult me and my whole family like that?”
“我要起诉航空公司和这架飞机上的每个人！怎么有人敢如此污辱我和我的家人！”
At hearing the noise, a stewardess hurried over to help out the screaming woman, and try to calm her down.
听到喧闹声，一名空姐急匆匆走过来帮助这名哭喊的女士，想让她平静下来。
“Excuse me, ma'am. Why don't you just settle back while I get you a tin of coke, a pillow for your head, and a banana for your monkey.”
“对不起，女士，消消气，我给你拿罐可乐，给你拿个枕头，再给你的猴子拿个香蕉。”