(单词翻译:单击)
背景介绍
【背景】
难以相处的人会让我们感到不自在，还会制造麻烦和棘手的问题。对缺乏经验的人来说，难以相处的人会成为生活中的致命因子、美景中的瑕疵、工作中的克星。然而，这一切的关键在人。了解人的行动、想法及其来由，我们就能避免不愉快的局面，棘手的问题也将迎刃而解。
摘自《如何与难相处的人打交道(Dealing with Difficult People) 》
英文原文
【原文】
Dr. Manny Alvarez: Who doesn’t have a difficult colleague, friend, or family member? The bad news, often times, you’re forced to interact with these people on a daily basis and they could have a personality disorder. But the good news is there are simple ways you can learn to deal with their behaviors.
Dr. Andrew Twardon: A person with a paranoid personality is someone who is very much preoccupied with loyalty of other people, uh, it is a person who constantly scans the environment and other people, looking for possible indications or signs of some sort of deception.
Dr. Alvarez: The solution Dr. Twardon suggests, stick to conversation topics that are safe, and not too personal. Avoid any signs of criticisms or attack, and refrain from using language that is patronizing or condescending.
Dr. Twardon: A narcissistic person really believes that she is better than you. And because I am better than you, I am entitled to expect that you do the things for me. I am entitled to be focused exclusively on my own needs and kind of disregard yours.
Dr. Alvarez: So how do you deal with those ego-maniacs? Don’t be defensive with this person; it could trigger a fight, and try to make yourself an important part of his or her world in order to keep up the relationship.
Dr. Twardon: That is essentially a person who is dealing with a lot of internal…call it insecurity, or internal anxiety, and internal conflicts. And the way of resolving internal conflicts is by organizing the external environment.
Dr. Alvarez: Dr. Twardon is talking about Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which can make others jumpy. Try acknowledging their hard work with compliments, compromise with them when possible, and also avoid conflict. And Dr. Twardon reminds us we all have a little bit of these personalities in ourselves, so treat others as you would like to be treated.
【中文译文】
曼尼·阿尔瓦雷斯医生：谁没有难相处的同事、朋友或家人呢？坏消息是，人们通常不得不每天和这些人打交道，而他们可能有人格障碍。但好消息是你可以学习一些应对他们行为的简单方法。
安德鲁·托登医生：性格偏执的人非常注重其他人的忠诚，嗯，这类人会不断地审视环境和其他人以找到某种欺骗的可能迹象或征兆。
阿尔瓦雷斯医生：托登医生建议的解决方法是：紧紧围绕“安全”的话题，不要过于涉及私事。避免任何批评或抨击的痕迹，不要使用傲慢或有优越感的措辞。
托登医生：自恋的人确信她比你优秀。因为我比你优秀，所以我有权让你为我做事，我有权只注重自己的需要，而有时忽略你的需要。
阿尔瓦雷斯医生：怎样跟那些自恋狂打交道呢？不用对这种人持防御姿态，这会引发争吵，试着让自己成为他或她的世界里重要的一员来维持你们的关系。
托登医生：本质上来说有一种人在不断解决很多内在的……叫作不安全感或内在焦虑、内在冲突。他们需要通过使外部环境条理化来解决内在冲突。
阿尔瓦雷斯医生：托登医生说的是会让其他人胆战心惊的强迫症。试着用赞美的话来肯定他们的辛勤工作，可能的话对他们妥协，同样要避免冲突。托登医生提醒我们：我们自己的性格中都会有一点这些个性，所以要像你希望自己被对待的方式那样来对待别人。
词汇讲解：
1. paranoid
a . 有妄想狂倾向的，类偏执狂的。
如：
My father locks every door in the house as he is paranoid about being robbed.
我父亲患有妄想狂, 常感到家里会失窃, 所以总是把每扇门都锁上。
Don't be so paranoid. I wasn't talking about you.
别那么猜疑，我不是在说你的事。
2. scan v . 细看，审视。
如：
I scanned the newspaper when I was waiting for the bus.
等公共汽车的时候, 我匆匆浏览了一下报纸。
The radar scanned the sky for enemy['enimi] planes.
雷达密切监视天空, 搜索敌机。
3. refrain v . 克制，抑制。
如：
I carefully refrained from looking at him.
我留意着避免朝他看。
Let's hope they will refrain from hostile actions.
希望他们不采取敌对行动
4. condescending a . 有优越感的，抱恩慈态度的。
如：
His condescending attitude really gets my back up.
他那种居高临下的恩赐态度实在使我很生气。
I don't like Mrs Smith; she's condescending.
我不喜欢史密斯夫人, 她总是自以为高人一等。
5. narcissistic a . 自我陶醉的，孤芳自赏的，自恋的。
6. jumpy a . 易受惊吓的，神经质的。
7. patronizing a . 显出优越感的。
(可可英语版权所有,未经允许请勿转载)
