Welcome, everyone.
欢迎各位
Thanks for coming to very important, first official diner meeting.
感谢出席这场非常重要的，餐馆首次正式会议
This ain't right, man. 2:00 A.M. starts Earl time.
真是不厚道，半夜两点后是厄尔的私人时间
Earl, here's your brandy.
厄尔，你的白兰地酒
Okay, we're good now.
很好，我没意见了
If I knew we were gonna have staff meetings after work,
早知道下班后要开这种破会议
I would've taken job at T.G.I. Friday's instead.
我就去矫情的星期五餐厅干活了
Over there, they roll fast and loose.
他们那，干活又快速，上床又迅速
Well, this is how I roll.
在我这，就得这样
Yeah, short and slow.
您哪样啊，又矮又呆吗
No, I roll Fast and Furious. Tokyo drift style.
不，我是速度与激情，还是东京漂移版的呢
Han, I'm starting to drift. Can we get to the point?
憨，我的注意力也开始"漂移"了，说重点吧
Max and I still have to get home and bake cupcakes for tomorrow.
我跟麦克斯还得回家烤明天的小蛋糕呢

We received so many excellent comments from customers tonight.
我们收到了来自顾客的许多宝贵意见
Okay, first comment.
好了，第一个意见
"Dark-haired waitress..." Hey!
"深色头发的服务生"。我哟
"was very rude." Hey!
"非常没礼貌"。我哟
Max, customers are giving their honest opinions about diner. We need to take it seriously.
麦克斯，这是顾客对餐馆的真实看法，我们得严肃对待
"I'd like to ride the blonde waitress like a tilt-a-whirl."
"我想跟金发服务生床战三百回合"
Shout out!
是我哟
Next comment. "Why does cashier wear earphones? I thought he was a DJ."
下一个意见。"为什么收银员戴着耳机啊，害我以为他是DJ"
Go, Earl, go, Earl ?
好样的，厄尔，好样的，厄尔
Holla!
完胜
Moving on. "This meatloaf tastes stale and dry."
下一条。"烘肉卷吃起来既不新鲜又干瘪瘪"
Yeah, Oleg yeah, Oleg.
干得好，奥列格，干得好，奥列格
It also says that cook could wear deodorant and shirt that covers armpit.
人家还建议，厨师喷点腋下除臭剂，穿点有袖的衣服挡挡臭味
This is on card?
人家真写上意见表了吗
Yes.
对
You are lying.
你撒谎
Yes.
对...
Remind me never to be a spy with Han.
跟憨搭档做间谍，死得更快哟
So this is how you tell me what you think of me?
所以你就这么对我提意见吗
You hide behind outdated method of feedback?
拿这种过时的意见卡当挡箭牌
What, I should've posted twit pic of my face like this?
不然是要推特发张，我这么捏鼻子的图吗
Maybe I will send you a twit pic of my meatloaf.
我也会回敬你一张我烘"鸡"卷的美照
Can you twits pick another time to do this?
你们俩白痴可以之后再吵吗
I've gotta go home.
我得回家了
I have to go home too...
我也得回家...
And cut the remaining sleeves off of all my shirts.
回家把所有衣服的袖子都剪掉
And then go buy more shirts.
然后再去买新衣服
And cut the sleeves off those shirts.
再把所有的袖子通通剪掉
You must wear sleeves.
你必须穿有袖的衣服上班
Do not tell me what to do.
老子爱穿啥穿啥
I was working here when you were still a dumpling on your father's chopstick.
老子刚来这上班的时候，你还在你爹的蛋蛋里游着呢
Now this is starting to sound like Earl time.
现在有厄尔时间的感觉了