Too many ideas, so, this basically goes in line with the topic... no topic sentence.
So then, okay, they know what he likes, what he doesn't like, his books, etc.
They can also talk to the child's teachers and find out how they can help him.
Okay, that's another way they can do, so, teachers have nobody to ask, or maybe they have the parents, who knows?
So, parents know their child best, parents can talk to the child's teachers,
they can find...they can monitor how much TV he watches, so they can... this is something else they can do, doesn't have anything to do with what he likes or doesn't like.
They can concen-... they can help his concentration by cutting down on TV, too many ideas, here.
Now, too many ideas is not a bad thing if each idea is expanded on, you elaborate, you explain why this is important, and you have to connect. Right?
Every sentence must flow in terms of ideas, logically, from one idea to the next.
So, here, this...this sentence and this sentence really have no connection, here, we're talking about what he likes; here about what they can do with their teachers.
Two completely separate ideas, not connected by anything. Okay?
Next, they can talk about TV, they can cut down on TV. Okay.
What does that have to do with talking to the child's teachers?
Nothing, again, no connection, different idea.
So the reader is going: "Umm, what are you trying to do here, like, what... what is the purpose of this essay, what is the purpose of this paragraph?"
The point is you're trying to support your idea, why you think parents are the best teacher.
Don't just throw in ideas, which brings us to point number four:
Good point... so, you're making good points, there's nothing wrong with the ideas, here; they're actually quite good, quite strong in terms of supporting your opinion.