Allen, i want to talk to you about this.
阿伦 我想和你聊聊这个
Because we are big fans, friends of Niall Horan from "one direction",
我们是单向乐队成员尼尔·霍兰的粉丝和朋友
And you cannot escapehe fact that you two look remarkably similar.
你不能否认你俩长得非常像
We do. Can you say i can't be the first person to have said that to you?
是的 我不是第一个对你说这话的人吧
No, people do it all the time, and it happened, i start to dance, oh, my god, Niall on the show on twitter.
不是 老是有人说 比如有人在推特上看到我在跳舞的视频 就说 天啊 尼尔上节目啦
It's flattering to me. I'm 38. he's 26.
我很荣幸 我38岁 他才26岁
He only recently tweeted that, he said he was in a restaurant and a waiter said has anyone ever told you
他最近就在推特上说 他说自己在一家餐厅 服务员说有没有人告诉过你
You look like that guy from "Downton Abbey"?
你看起来像《唐顿庄园》里的那个人
So i'm guessing Niall had a really big night.
所以我猜尼尔那天晚上过的很棒
If he started to look like me, i'm worried. Moisturize more, Niall.
如果他开始像我的话 我会担心 他的脸更水润
I could see Allen Leech in a boy band. How would you feel in a boy band. Would you be any good? No, i have a crippling fear of singing in front of people.
我想看你组建男子乐队 你组建一个男子乐队会怎么样 那样好不好 不 我非常害怕在人们面前唱歌
Brought on by my mother who thought it was a great idea to get me to sing at my grand aunt's golden jubilee as a nun.
这个问题怪我妈 她认为让我在我姑姑成为修女的金禧庆典上演唱是个好主意
2,000 people, i learned this big holy song, i was 13,
庆典上有2000个人 13岁的我学了这首圣歌
And whatever the nun playing the organ, a good 400 meters away, played a different song. What am I supposed to sing.
而在400米开外的地方 不管那个弹奏管风琴的修女弹奏的是什么 她弹奏的曲子和应该唱的曲子不一样 我还怎么唱
So that did not go great. And what was most interesting was i did the first verse and i looked down,
所以效果并不好 最有意思的是 我唱完第一段后 往下面看

You know, my family are going to be there, they're going to support me, and my father was creased over laughing.
你知道 我的家人会在那里 他们会支持我 我父亲笑的褶子都出来了
And when he did look over he was, like -- and i took that as keep going, so i did another verse.
当他看过来的时候 他就像——我把这当成了鼓励 所以我又唱了一段
So i cannot sing. So there's no danger of your joining one direction at any point?
所以我不能唱歌 所以你是不会加入单向乐队的啦
No. At this stage there was a band called west life. We could set up mid life.
不会 现在有个叫做西城男孩的组合 我可以组建一个名为中年生活的乐队
Mid life and the album could be called wrong direction.
中年乐队 出个专辑可以起名为错误方向
And i'll come in at the end and go, yeah, yeah. Terrence no, no.
我可以再最后一个出场 特伦斯 不 不
Something y'all don't know is we're probably related. I'm 9% irish.
你不知道 我们可能是亲戚 我有9%的爱尔兰血统
Great! Look, can you give me any advice? And i'm 7% british.
好棒 你能给我什么建议吗 而且我有7%的英国血统
My mom's in the audience tonight. Mom, is there anything you need to tell us?
今天我母亲在观众席 妈你有什么事情要告诉我们吗