Right now I want to talk about something else that people will not stop making, and that is kids.

现在我要聊人们乐此不疲喜欢造的东西 那就是孩子

They're cute. They're adorable.

他们很萌很可爱

But when it comes to having them, it's a hard pass.

但养孩子是一条艰辛的道路

And I'm going to show you why. It's a segment called Why I Don't Have Kids.

我来告诉大家为什么 这是“我为什么不要孩子”的环节

I did it and kept singing.

我一边唱一边那样做

I didn't realize I did that, and my mouth kept going.

我都不知道自己是那种表情 嘴不自觉地跟着唱

The first one is from Haley from Broken Arrow, Oklahoma.

第一个是来自俄克拉荷马州断箭的Haley

"Our son pulled a cord and the TV came down."

“我们儿子拉了根绳子 然后电视掉下来了”

His shirt says, I am why we can't have nice things. I don't know--

他的衣服上写着 我就是我们无法拥有美好事物的原因 不知道

--if he was wearing that ahead of time or--

不知道他本来就穿的这件还是

Hold still. I want to get your picture, but let me put something on you.

别动 我要给你拍张照 但得先给你穿件衣服

This one is from Teia in Lincoln, Nebraska.

这个来自内布拉斯加州林肯的Teia

"My kids got into the beanbag." Oh now, this is horrible.

“我的孩子们钻进了豆子袋里” 哦 太可怕了

How do you get into the beanbag? Wow, that is worse than glitter, almost.

怎么会钻进豆子袋呢？哇哦 这比闪光粉还可怕 差不多了

This one is from Zany from New Zealand-- Zany from New Zealand.

这个来自新西兰的Zany

"My twins got a hold of some eggs."

“我的双胞胎孩子弄了些鸡蛋”

Who has that many eggs? I mean--

谁家会有那么多鸡蛋呀？

How far out in New Zealand do you live that you have to--

你们离市区是有多远以至于要——

What, do you have chickens living in your house or something?

怎么 你家养的有鸡吗还是怎么回事？

But if you add some wine to that, that's a diet right there.

不过要是加点红酒的话 就是一道菜了

This one is from Bridget from Hudson Falls, New York.

这个来自纽约哈德森瀑布的Bridget

"My daughter found the French onion dip."

“我女儿发现了法国洋葱乳”

Again, that's a lot of French onion dip right there.

这法国洋葱乳还真不少啊

If your kids do something you think I should see, please send it to me.

如果你的孩子做了你觉得该让我看的事 请发给我

We will be right back.

马上回来