Hey, if you're looking for something to do for Valentine's Day,

嘿 如果你不知道情人节该干什么

that new Fifty Shades movie just came out. So that would be a good one.

新的《五十度灰》电影出来了 是个不错的选择

Yeah, yeah. Did you all see it? I was surprised by some of the cameos.

嗯 对 大家都看了吗？有些配角出乎意料啊

Here's the trailer.

这是预告片

Ouch. What? What happened?

疼啊 什么 怎么了

My junk. Hang on, it popped out.

我的老二 等下 弹出来了

How was that? That was a good day, wasn't it?

怎么样 那天过得很开心吧

Yeah, that-- they are all great, Ellen. Every day with you is great.

对 他们都很好 艾伦 有你的每天都很好

Yeah. It's wonderful. Would you want to do that again?

嗯 很好 你还想再来一次吗？

I sure would not. No, no. All right, something else that you need to check out is Planet Earth Two.

打死也不 不 不 好 大家还应该看一下《地球脉动2》

It has amazing footage from all over the world.

里面有世界各地超惊艳的镜头

And this season they filmed some places that you would never expect.

这一季他们拍了一些你绝对想不到的地方

Take a look. Tuscany, Italy.

看一下 意大利 托斯卡纳区

A lone bachelor enjoys a meal with two of his mates,

一名单身汉与他的两位女伴一起共进晚餐

hoping to decide which female he should exile from his path, he temporarily courts each female.

为了决定驱逐哪位女伴 他暂时向两位女性献殷勤

Similar to the yellow crowned parakeet, the bachelor and his date exchange nutrients via regurgitation.

与黄冠鹦鹉相似 这名单身汉跟他的女伴通过反刍来交换营养

After spending time with both females, the bachelor must demonstrate his decision by awarding one female a flower.

与两位女性共度一段时光之后 单身汉必须向一名女性送出玫瑰花 以表心意

He has chosen the long hair. This decision forces the short hair to flee.

他选择了长头发的 这使得短头发的女伴仓皇而逃

However, I am recently single, so if the short hair likes British accents, she can contact me at 5, 5, 5, 9, 2--

不过 我还单身呢 如果短头发的女性喜欢英国口音 那就联系我吧 55592

That didn't seem like enough numbers.I just heard four numbers.

电话号码不全啊 我才听到了四个数字

So I don't know. They're not going to be able to contact him. All right, let's move on.

不知道 他们联系不上你了 好 我们继续

I want to talk about the president. Not that one, the other president.

我想说说总统 不是那个 是另一个

President Obama had his presidential portrait unveiled over the weekend.

奥巴马总统周末公布了他的总统肖像

At least that was his excuse for not attending my birthday party.

至少他没法参加我生日派对的时候是那么说的

But the portrait was beautiful, and I think it really captured his essence.

不过肖像很好看 确实抓住了他的特点

How about that? It's pretty sharp. Yeah, we posed for hours.

咋样？不错啊 那是 我们摆了好几个小时

That was-- in honor of Valentine's Day, I thought I'd show you some kids valentines that my viewers sent in.

为了纪念情人节 我想给大家看一下观众寄来的一些儿童情人

This one right here is from Janet from San Diego, California.

这个来自加利福尼亚圣地亚哥的珍妮特

Mommy, I love you sometimes.

妈咪 我有时候挺爱你的

I'm sure she feels the same. April from Little Rock, Arkansas.

你妈妈肯定也感同身受 阿肯色州小岩城的艾普利

Dear Mom, you are nice, funny. And you love me.

亲爱的妈妈 你很善良 有趣 你也很爱我

I know your hormones are crazy, but I don't mind, because you still love me.

我知道你的荷尔蒙有点疯狂 不过我不介意 因为你还是爱我的

So she's seven and already has mastered the art of a backhanded compliment.

她才七岁 就掌握了用讽刺来恭维人的技能

That's very impressive. Mark from Ann Arbor, Michigan.

很厉害呀 密歇根安阿伯市的马克

Dear Mom and Dad, I love you so much. I love dinner you made on January 28, 2004.

亲爱的爸爸妈妈 我很爱你们 我喜欢你们在2004年1月28号那天做的晚饭

Love, Jackson. Wow, I really want to know what that dinner was.

爱你们的杰克逊 哇 我真想知道那天晚上做的啥

That must have been amazing. I don't even know what I had for lunch today.

肯定特别棒 我都不记得今天中午吃的啥

I don't remember. Did I have lunch? I don't even know.

不记得了 我吃午饭了吗？吃没吃饭都不记得

I don't think I had lunch. I may have. Wendy from Portland, Maine, sent this valentine.

我应该没吃午饭 可能吃过了 缅因州波特兰的温蒂发来了这张贺卡

I don't know what it is. I don't know--

不知道这是个啥 不知道

But it looks happy. It looks like it's--

不过这玩意儿看起来挺开心的 看起来

all right. As you know, we-- take it down. As you know, we play a lot of games on my show.

好 你们知道 快跳过 大家知道 我节目上经常会玩游戏

Sometimes I have guests who play, Who would you rather?

有时候会有嘉宾玩 你宁愿选谁？

I am happily married, so I don't need to play that game.

我婚姻美满幸福 所以我不玩那个游戏

But it gave me an idea for a new game that's perfect for me.

不过我想到了一个超级适合我的游戏

It's full of photos of cats and dogs. It's time for Who'd you rather pet.

全是猫狗的照片 现在来玩“你宁愿选哪个当宠物”吧

So here's how it goes. They're going to show me two cute animals, and I haven't seen them.

是这么玩的 他们会给我看两个可爱的动物 我从来没看过的

This is the first time I'm seeing them. Then I will pick which one I'd rather pet.

这也是我第一次看见 我会选一个来当宠物

They're adorable, but I'm going to say Kittie Couric for sure.

都很可爱 不过我肯定选猫咪Couric

I'm going to stick with Kittie Couric.

还是猫咪Couric

How often do you get-- you don't get to pet a deer too often, so I'm going to stick to-- I'm going to change to Doe Jonas.

弄个小鹿当宠物的机会并不多呀 所以我坚持 我换成小鹿Jonas

Oh, Ewie Lewis. I'm going to switch to Ewie Lewis. Kitty Perry.

哦 Ewie Lewis 我换Ewie Lewis 猫咪Perry

I'm going to stick with Ewie Lewis. Ah.

还是Ewie Lewis 啊

I'm changing to Waddles the duck. Ellen Barkin.

我换成鸭子Waddles Ellen Barkin

No, I'm sticking with Waddles.

不 还选Waddles

Harry P. Otter. I'm going to go to Harry P. Otter now.

Harry P. Otter 我换成Harry P. Otter

Pig Notaro. That's very funny. I'm going to go to Pig.

猪猪Notaro 有点意思 我选猪猪

I'll pet a pig. Scarlett O'Hairy. OK, I'm going to go to Scarlett.

我养猪猪 Scarlett O'Hairy 好 我选Scarlett

Abe Vigoata. I'm going to Abe. I'm stick-- All right, Abe Vigoata.

Abe Vigoata 我选Abe 坚持 好 Abe Vigoata

That's how you play who'd you rather pet. Yes.

就是这么玩“你宁愿选哪个当宠物”的 对

Tune in next time when we play Who'd you rather lather?

下次我们玩“你宁愿揍谁”的时候 记得来看哦