(单词翻译:单击)
Guys you ever see a photo in the news and think, that headline could be much, much better?
大家有没有看过一些新闻标题，觉得它应该会更好？
All the time. Yeah. Well, I'll show you what I mean. It's time for News Improved. Here we go. News Improved.
一直都这么觉得，我来给大家举几个例子，现在是《改新闻》时间了。《改新闻》啦。
For example, check out this first photo here. The original headline was Trump Defends Putin at Summit.
比如来看看第一张照片，新闻标题是小特在峰会上为普京说话。
The headline can definitely be improved because if you only look at the photo, the headline could have been,
标题可以改一改，因为如果你看到照片，你的标题应该是，
Men Avoid Eye Contact in Urologist Waiting Room.
在泌尿科等待室，男性朋友拒绝对眼。
Check out this next photo. The original headline was College Basketball Coaches Concerned About Tournaments.
来看看下一张图，他们的标题是大学篮球教练为锦标赛担忧。
But if you only looked at the photo, the headline could have been Lord Voldemort Launches Used-Car Dealership.
但你看了照片后，标题可以改成伏地魔发起二手车经销。
This next headline was Trump Hotels Shows Link Between U.S. and Russia.
下一张的标题是小特酒店证实美俄关系。
Headline could have been, Arts-and-Crafts Day Huge Hit at Summer Camp. Lanyards. Wow. Wow.
标题可以改成，手工美术节在夏令营大受欢迎，哦哦。
Next headline was Trade Rumors Surround Orioles Shortstop.
这张照片的标题是金莺队游击手曝转会传闻。
Headline could have been, Man still saying 'Wazzup!' in 2018.
标题可以改成，2018年人们依然会说“Wazzup”。
Wazzup! The next headline was, Commerce Secretary to Sell Stock.
Wazzup，下一个标题是商务部部长卖股票。
Headline could have been, Man Can't Believe Table That Was Just Seated Already Got Food.
标题可以改成刚刚还有人座的桌子现在摆满了吃的。
Do you believe that? This next headline was, President Weighs Supreme Court Options.
你相信吗？下一个标题是总统权衡高院选择。
The headline could have been, Game of Charades Goes Downhill When Dad Acts Out Shake Weight. All right. Hey, Dad, hey.
标题可以改成，老爸做出摇摆铃的动作，猜字游戏一下没得玩了。
The next headline was, 300-Foot Iceberg Spotted Near Greenland.
下一个标题是格林兰附近发现300英尺冰山。
The headline could have been, Stars of 'Titanic': Where Are They Now?
标题可以改成，泰坦尼克之星，你在哪里？
My jewel. Please. Hold on. If it really means that much, don't go by the edge of the boat. Yeah, don't throw it away.
我的首饰，别这样，如果它真的很重要，不要走到轮船边缘去，不要扔下去。
Put it in a safe. There's probably a safe in the room. Yeah, save it, man. They would have got it later.
放在保险箱里，房间里应该有保险箱，省省吧，他们一会就能拿到。
Yeah, the trick is to set up the digital codes. But once you figure it out, very usable safes. Yeah.
最好的方式是电子码，一旦你想到用它，那一定非常好用。
Put it in your pocket, man. You were clothed. My jewelry! My jewelry fell off.
放到口袋里，你穿着衣服，我的首饰掉了。
Grandma Sandler. Adam Sandler was in Titanic.
桑德勒奶奶，亚当·桑德勒在泰坦尼克号上。
I just lost my necklace! Near or far, And finally, this headline was, Trump Balloon Takes Flight in London.
我丢了项链，很远或很近，最后一条标题是小特气球在伦敦上空飞翔。
The headline could have been, Pillsbury Doughboy Not Aging Well.
标题可以改成，面团宝宝好像还没长大。
There you go. That's all the time we have for News Improved.
这就是今天的《改新闻》节目。
