You guys, it was 90 degrees in New York City today.
朋友们，今天纽约达到了90华氏度BK;_nh~0Ed5nL6;bqft。
Yeah. You know it's bad when you get that dirty gust of wind from the subway and you go,
没错，吸入地铁的污浊空气一定很糟糕，
Ahh! Wow. That feels good. I hope everyone had a good Father's Day. Did you have a good Father's Day?
但你却哦哦...这个感觉不错，希望所有人都能够度过一个愉快的父亲节，你们的父亲节愉快吗？
I read that, this year, Americans spent around 15 billion dollars on Father's Day.
听说今年，美国在父亲节花费了150亿美金bcHX@a&edrx8)-G;;m+H。
When dads thanked their kids for the gifts, the kids were like,
当父亲们感谢孩子送的礼物时，孩子们会说，
No problem. I ordered them using your Amazon account. Right? Cool?
没问题，我用的是你的亚马逊账户爸爸，太棒了XKec*mY(aw|-msOC7|3H。
Let's get to some news here. He's talked about it before, but, today,
来看看其他新闻，小特之前谈过，但今天，
President Trump officially ordered the creation of a new military branch. Check this out.
小特官方命令建造军事分支，来看看他是怎么说的B#;zaAYcs^N9h5Prl#w。
I'm hereby directing the Depart of Defense and Pentagon to immediately begin the process necessary
我命令国防部和五角大楼马上运作必要程序，
to establish a Space Force as the sixth branch of the Armed Forces.
建造太空部队，我们的第六个分支部队PJptc[=XQi&B.hF.lcs。
The Space Force. Trump was like, It won't be that hard. It's not like it's rocket science. It's.....
太空部队，小特认为这不是难事，这不是什么高深的东西oJ4-noawOKC4y=2voV3。
Actually, it is. That's right...Trump wants the Space Force to be the sixth branch of the military.
其实真的很高深，没错，小特希望建造太空部队，我们的第六个军事分支部队J|ZKrP%;eNJslBon*-^@。
He said, It will come right after the Army, the Navy, the Marines, the Avengers, and the Incredibles.
他说他将排在陆军，海军，海豹突击队，复仇者联盟以及超人特工队之后zbT]+)fBs4,d9。
But it was true he's actually creating the Space Force.
但其实他真的在打造太空部队t6GW7]-fv3y;OZR[fD=4。
It's all part of Trump's plan to have one stupid idea distract from his other stupid ideas.
其实这是小特从一个愚蠢想法换到另外一个愚蠢想法的计划1,ULIp*FXea|。
You go, What is next? Well, this is a big story. The Trump administration is facing criticism
下一个是什么？下面是大新闻，小特政府面临指责，
for separating immigrant children from their parents.
原因是将移民儿童和父母分离GKCj-8WSCf。
Some people say they couldn't believe Trump would do something like this.
许多人不相信小特会干出这样的事情R#IeZ%mIzjqg~g&Mkr。
Then African-Americans, Muslims, DACA recipients, transgender troops, and Special Olympians were like, We can.
随后，非洲裔美国人，穆斯林，追梦人受益人，以及变性部队，以及特殊奥运会成员称，我们可以这么做wEwoV%70,H。
We could see it. That's right, the Trump administration is separating immigrant kids from their parents at the border.
我们能看到，小特政府将边境儿童和父母分离O9=t6k)[H(TESSO#-YJ。
But experts say there's an easy fix to the problem, the midterms.
但专家称其实解决办法很简单，那就是中期选举zO!9pX.DfVk&yi。
That's right. A lot of people are upset about it. Even Melania Trump came out against her husband.
没错，许多人对此感到不安，就连梅拉尼娅都要反对丈夫1Y!-f.(2ePB)2L#i)aB。
This is real. Her office released a statement that said Mrs. Trump hates to see children separated from their families.
没错，她的办公室公布声明，称特朗普女士反对儿童和父母分离YM]-+isZ.slq3(5n。
Then it said however, Mrs. Trump is totally okay with wives being separated from their husbands.
之后又说，特朗普女士对妻子和丈夫分离表示谅解vMDwe;M;!9Q[|T7IN.L。

Here's some good news, you guys. This weekend, Beyonce and Jay-Z released a surprise album together,
来看看其它新闻，本周末碧昂丝和Jay-Z一起推出了专辑，此举很让人意外，
along with a new music video that they filmed inside the Louvre in Paris.
一起公布的还有一个MV，这是他们在巴黎卢浮宫拍摄的hkg,QUbx#oKs,I+_mG。
And a lot of people in the art world have reacted to the video, including some actual pieces of art.
许多艺术品中的人物对此做出了回应，包括一些真实存在的艺术品[3q-i@+u=xg。
Really? I'll show you what I mean. Yeah. For example, Van Gogh's self-portrait said I might only have one ear,
真的吗？来看看，比如梵高的自画像说，我或许只有一只耳朵，
but I can still tell this album is lit a-f. Wow! Wow!
但我依然可以说，这张专辑棒极了iaT9O6x*~+PW2KL-a。
I didn't know that. He said it was lit a-f. He said Van Gogh, The painting...
真没听说过，他说棒极了，梵高说的，这幅画，
Yeah. His self-portrait said, Said it's lit a-f. Yeah, that's right. Wow!
没错，他的自画像说的，他说棒极了，哦哦p2exL6sE~8DH7Q=1#g)|。
Next up, American Gothic was like we're basically the Beyonce and Jay-Z of the art world.
下一个是，《美式哥特》说，我们基本上就是二人在艺术当中的模样~uR3_JA._0jBjvBuXt。
Game respecting game. Wow! And, finally, the Mona Lisa was like good luck figuring out what I thought.
尊严游戏，哦哦，最后一个说是《蒙娜丽莎》，她说你们猜到了我在想什么，太棒了S6]7Q&q_TH。
Ooh! She's so hard to read! So hard to read that Lisa. Oh, man.
哦哦，她太难解读了，太难解读丽莎了，天啊by,dyBQZED4Nh.=iqPx。
Is she smiling? Does she know a secret? Yeah. She's got a secret. I don't know. We don't know what's happening.
她是在微笑吗？她有秘密吗？她有秘密，我不知道，我们不知道发生了什么s.z4SlqA+n。
Allergies. We have no idea. Flonase. Turns out the Mona Lisa just had allergies.
过敏，不知道，用葛兰素史克，其实蒙娜丽莎患上了过敏症;2IwZWWTJ7an|.。
Yeah. Do you think that's what it was? That's the mysterious look.
没错，你以为这是什么，神秘的样子NLOSy@z5N,yZ-.eFCIC。
She's about to sneeze or something. Lit a-f.
她是要打喷嚏或怎样，太棒了Uu3J69aBtjV^|CHi。
Get this, guys, I read about a marijuana company in Los Angeles that just sold a joint that's 3 feet long.
来听听这个，听说一家洛杉矶大麻公司卖了一根3英尺长的大麻Uo1j]5qot^bJi|Pn-]。
And this is very thoughtful. They even included a little guide explaining what happens when you smoke a 3-foot joint.
这引人深思，他们甚至还奉上了说明，解释当你吸食这根3英尺大麻时会发生什么bQ8t#aGW16~AtC1;。
Check this out. After 6 inches you call the supermarket to ask why peanut butter doesn't come in sticks like regular butter.
来看看，6英寸后，你给超市打电话，询问为什么花生酱不能像普通酱一样，一根一根的0~L^I4)*~z)y,。
After a foot you realize you're talking into your wallet instead of your phone.
一英尺之后，你发现你对着钱包说话，而不是手机xEO+c];Qb7WJ*ZHP-9c。
After a foot and a half you try to plug your wallet in so you can call the supermarket and get to the bottom of this peanut butter thing.
1.5英尺之后，你试着将钱包插进去，这样你可以给超市打电话了，直接深入到花生酱底部IVj6p!8xa0ZOz。
After 2 feet you realize you've stuffed your wallet into a jar of peanut butter.
2英尺之后，你发现你的钱包已经在花生酱罐里了LcLY@oRZ+S。
After 2 1/2 feet, you bring you peanut-buttered wallet to the Apple store to get repaired.
2.5英尺之后，你带着花生酱钱包去苹果商店维修v_o#0S-Q_!0;8l。
And, last, after 3 feet, the guy working at the genius bar says, Mr Rogen, this is a sephora.
3英尺之后，在天才吧工作的员工说，罗根先生，这一切都是虚构的Gd9V3_n^ZeiZY[pwCypb。
Just don't, Steer clear， You don't need 3 feet of... And, finally, this is interesting.
远离大麻，你不需要三英尺的大麻，这个有意思eDBVfbDk!GGO0K。
A new survey found that fewer teenagers are having sex and doing drugs.
新研究发现青少年发生性关系和吸毒的数量在减少CMOEh)NoYPWL@&7sxs。
Or and hear me out，they're lying. There you go. We have a great show tonight. Give it up for The Roots!
或者说，他们在说谎，今晚的节目很精彩，掌声送给紫金合唱团i,7;DCakpvtsN-#。