Christmas is here,
圣诞节来了
and for many people that means presents, caroling, and getting together with family,
对很多人来说圣诞节是一个收礼物 唱颂歌以及和家人
but for me, Christmas reminds me of the day I proposed to my wife.
团聚的时刻 但对我来说 圣诞节会让我想起我想我妻子求婚的哪一天
I did it on Christmas day. Aw!
我就是在圣诞节求的婚 哇塞
I know. You're thinking it's romantic. It's actually a good ploy.
我知道你们想什么 你们觉得这也太浪漫了吧 实际上这是个精心策划的计谋
Because you don't have to get a present.
因为这样你就不用买圣诞礼物了呀
You have to buy the ring anyway. No present.
反正戒指是怎样都要买的 圣诞礼物就省掉了

Now if you're thinking of proposing to your wife,
如果你准备向妻子求婚的话
there is one service you may be interested in checking out.
这里有一项服务你可能想了解一下
Because there's a new internet start-up called Swanluv
有一家叫做swanluv的互联网公司
that will give you $10,000 to help pay for your wedding.
愿意出10000美元让你筹办婚礼
However, if you get divorced, you must pay the money back, plus interest. Right? I know.
然而 如果你们离婚 你们就必须把这笔钱还回去 外加上利息 我知道你们在想什么
What better way to start your life together than with the threat of financial ruin hanging over your head.
有什么比时刻面临家庭出现经济危机的威胁更有趣的生活方式呢
Some people think these guys prey on tragedy,
有人觉得这个公司就是见不得别人婚姻美满
but the company also offers marriage counseling once the couple is married, right?
但是与此同时 这个公司还为夫妻提供婚姻咨询的服务
That's how they sort of justify it.
他们就以此来反驳那些说他们诅咒别人婚姻的人
So let me get this straight.
我们来理一理哈
The company that makes money from that couple breaking up will be offering up advice to save that couple's marriage.
这家公司在通过别人婚姻破裂来获利的同时 还提供挽救婚姻的咨询服务
Why do I get the feeling every counseling session will just be, I don't know.
为什么我觉得 这个婚姻顾问会说 嗯 我觉得吧
I think she is cheating on you, man.
你的妻子在骗你
If the couple breaks up, they have to pay back the loan.
如果婚姻破裂 夫妻就要偿还这笔钱
I think this company is underestimating a couple's ability to stay in a terrible relationship.
我就觉得这家公司低估了人们对糟糕的婚姻关系的承受能力
I once didn't break up with a woman for two years because she owned a washer/dryer combo.
我曾经跟一位女士在一起两年 就因为她有一台洗干一体机
One guy who shouldn't make this deal with Swanluv is a man in Houston, Texas,
有一个住在德克萨斯州休斯敦的人不应该跟swanluv做这笔交易
who is in some hot water after shutting down traffic on one of the busiest freeways in the United States
他现在正面临一堆麻烦 他妨碍了美国最繁忙的一条高速公路的交通
so he could propose to his girlfriend.
为了向女友求婚
Love can make you do some crazy things, especially when you're young.
爱情使人疯狂 年轻时犹会如此
But shutting down one of the busiest freeways in the nation to get on one knee and propose.
但阻塞美国最繁忙的一条高速公路就为了求婚
Love makes you do stupid things.
只能说爱情使人脑残
If you think that's inconvenient,
如果你觉得他这么做会给很多人带来不便的话
their wedding will take place on the day before thanksgiving in the security checkpoint line at the airport.
他们还要在感恩节那一天 在机场nag的安检处办婚礼
When people ask how he popped the question, she's going to have to be like
当被问到他是怎么求婚的时候 妻子会说
you remember last Tuesday when it took you two and a half hours to get home from work?
你还记得上周二 你下班回家时用了两个半小时吗
Well—The proposal was actually very sweet.
额——其实求婚现场还是挺甜蜜的
The man was like, Michelle, from the moment I met you I knew that we would—dodge caravan!
男方说 米歇尔 从我见到你的那一刻起 我就知道——闪开 有车
People on that freeway knew there was a proposal coming because their GPS was like,
走这条高速公路的人都知道 前面有人求婚 因为他们的导航系统说
In a quarter of a mile, prepare to throw up in your mouth a little.
前方四分之一英里处 请准备好您的口水
But the girl did actually say yes.
但是女方还是同意了的
We actually have a photo that she posted on her Facebook page. It is very sweet.
我们这还有一张女方发在脸书上的照片 看起来非常甜蜜