I love kids, they're sweet and they're funny, but I don't want any and
我很喜欢小孩 他们可爱又有趣 但我一个都不想要
They're sticky. It's what they are, and so my viewers send me pictures to remind me why I don't want kids.
他们太粘人了 孩子就是这样 我的观众给我发了一些照片 提醒了我为啥不想要孩子
And this is from Kurt in Sidney Australia. My daughter wanted to help paint the living room.
这张是来自澳大利亚悉尼的库尔特 我女儿想帮我给客厅涂料
Mm, hash tag white people problems.
嗯 “白人的烦恼”
This is from Chris in Terra Haute, Indiana. My son got in my dirty laundry.
这张来自印第安纳州泰瑞豪特的克里斯 我儿子钻到我的脏衣服堆里去了

And coincidentally, their apartment number's 36C.
凑巧的是 他们的公寓号码是36C
This is from Amy and Casper Wyoming. This is my youngest son Lincoln.
这张来自怀俄明州卡斯帕的艾米 这是我最小的儿子林肯
Like a little baked potato. He looks like he's a
像个烤土豆 他看起来像 他是
This is from Tracy in Ontario, Canada. My two-year-old obsessed with make-up.
这张是加拿大安大略的特蕾西发来的 我两岁的女儿对化妆欲罢不能啊
Not only did she get lipstick in her eyes, she's standing on a slippery counter but make sure you get that picture before you help her.
她不光把口红弄到眼睛里了 还站在很滑的水池边上 不过你帮她之前一定要拍张照片哦
To recap here's a list of things that you can't have if you have children, makeup, markers, beanbag chairs, nice things.
扼要重述一下 如果你有孩子的话你就不能有这些东西 化妆品 记号笔 豆袋椅和所有好看的东西
Not only do you send me pictures your also send me videos, here's some more reasons that I don't have kids.
你们不仅给我发来了照片还有视频呢 这就更解释了我为啥不要熊孩子
Did mommy tell you not to do this to those couch cushions that I was washing, cuz you made them dirty?
妈咪有没有跟你说过我在清洗被你弄脏的沙发垫时不要这么干？
Tristan what did you do? I put You got into the flour? Yeah.
特里斯坦 你做了什么？我 你在跟面粉玩？对啊
What happened? Daddy mustache. You wanted to have a mustache like daddy? Yes.
怎么回事 爸爸的胡子 你想要爸爸那样的胡子？嗯嗯
Why'd you make a big mess? Because it's beautiful.
你怎么弄的这么乱啊 因为它太漂漂了
Nice moves. And he's going to take a shot. He's going to take a shot.
动作不错 他要射球了 他要射球了
If you have a picture or video of your kid, you can send it to me.
如果你也有孩子的照片或视频 可以发给我