It doesn't feel right. I don't know what you're talking about. Oh, that. Penny did that.
就是感觉不对。不知道你在说些什么。哦，那个啊，佩妮弄的。
Excuse me. Why don't you just eat in your desk chair?
不好意思。坐写字椅那吃不就好了嘛。
Why don't I just eat in my desk chair? Here we go.
坐写字椅那吃不就好了嘛？开始了。
That is my desk chair. That is where I work.
那是我写字椅，是我工作的地方。
I don't eat in my desk chair and I don't work in my spot. I work in my desk chair and eat in my spot.
我不在写字椅那吃东西，不在我的位置上工作，而是在写字椅工作，在我的位置上吃饭。
Wack adoodle. You know, there's kind of an obvious solution here. Get up.
怪里怪气。要知道，有个很容易的解决办法，起来。
There. Problem solved. Nobody cares where you're going to sit. You're not crazy.
好了，解决。没人在乎你坐哪，你又不是疯子。
Excuse me, but the problem is not solved.
抱歉，但问题没解决啊。
If your head had been accidentally amputated, and we transplanted a dog's head in its place, would that be "problem solved"?
要是你的脑袋意外被割掉了，我们把狗脑袋给你移植过去，你说问题解决了吗？
If it were your head, it would be.
要是你的脑袋，我看成。
Sheldon, I am really, really sorry, but it's only for a week. Can't you be a little bit flexible?
谢尔顿，我十分十分抱歉，但就一周嘛，你就将就点不行吗？
Yeah, sorry. I didn't really think that through.
哦对不起，我没想好就开口了。
You claimed it's going to be a week, but I have no faith in your dry cleaner. Why not?
你说一周就行，但我信不过你那干洗工。为什么？
Did you notice the sign on his counter?
你注意到他柜台上的招牌没？
He's not a fulltime dry cleaner. He also makes keys.
他不是专职干洗工，他还是个配钥匙的。
Oh, for God's sake, Sheldon. Focus is important. Was Michael DeBakey a wedding planner in between heart transplants?
看在老天的份上谢尔顿。办事专注很重要的，心脏移植专家麦可?德贝基会兼职做婚礼策划员吗？
Did Alexander Fleming moonlight as a hairdresser? "Thanks for discovering penicillin. Now how about we try a bouffant?"
细菌学家亚历山大?弗莱明会兼做美发师吗？”感谢你发现了青霉素，现在做个蓬松波浪发型怎样？
Ooh, looks like I'm gonna have sex tonight.
看来我今晚要嘿咻了。
Hey, baby... His right hand is calling him?
宝贝你好...他的右手给他打电话了？
No, it's Leslie Winkle. It's a long story.
不是啦。是莱斯莉?温科，说来话长。
I'll pick you up in ten minutes. Gentlemen, adieu.
我十分钟后去接你。先生们再会。
I thought we were going to play Halo tonight.
我们还得一起玩光晕呢。
What am I supposed to do, Leonard? There's a woman out there anxious to have sex with me. You understand, right?
我该怎么做，兰纳德？有个女人正急切的盼望和我上床呢，你肯定能理解吧？
No. Not at all. Nevertheless, I must depart.
不，完全不能。不管怎样，我得出发了。
By the way, did I tell you? Leslie pulled some strings and got me on the research trip to Geneva to check out the CERN Super collider.
对了，我告诉过你没有，由于莱斯莉暗箱操作，我能去日内瓦的欧洲物理研究所参观超级超导对撞机了。
That's not fair. You're not even a physicist.
这不公平，你又不是物理学家。
Okay, there are two ways of looking at this...Get out.
你可以换个角度看...出去！
You're improving. Thank you. It helps when I get to practice with a real woman.
你有进步了。谢谢，和真正的女人在一起进步快。
Hey, listen. Saturday my sister's getting married. I I want you to come with me. It's black tie.
嘿，我姐姐周六要结婚了，我想你跟我一起去，是半正式场合。
Yeah, gee, I'd really rather not. Why not?
我还真不太想去。为什么？
When I go to weddings, it's to scam on chunky bridesmaids. I don't know what I would do with a date.
我去婚礼都是去骗胖胖的伴娘的，不知道带了伴该干点啥。
Oh, all right. I understand. Thanks. Hey, I'm really sorry about that Geneva trip.
哦好吧，能理解。谢谢。日内瓦的事很抱歉。
What about it? Oh, didn't you hear? I had to reduce the number of people going, and you didn't make the cut.
怎么了？你没听说，我要削减出行的人数，你被选下来了。
When did that happen? About 12 seconds ago.
啥时候的事？大概12秒之前吧。
Well, hold on. Are you saying if I don't go to the wedding, I can't go to Geneva?
等等，你是说我不去婚礼就去不了日内瓦？
Actually, I'm trying not to say it.
我就是不想说那么明白嘛。
Okay, I'm sorry, but that makes me a little uncomfortable.
好吧抱歉，但我觉得有点不自在。
How so? Because it's like you're controlling me with new equipment and research trips.
怎么会？感觉你在用新仪器和外出调研控制我。
Well, if I weren't controlling you with new equipment and research trips, then I'd be uncomfortable.
要是我不用新仪器和外出调研控制你，就该换我不自在了。
How so? Cause then we'd be in, like, a real relationship with feelings and all that crap.
怎么会？因为那样的话，我们就好像真正在交往了。
So, bottom line, I'm just a bought-and-paid-for sex toy.
那么说到底，我就是你摆弄的嘿咻玩偶。
No. No, not at all. You're also arm candy. So? What do you think?
不，才不是，你还是个好伴儿。怎样？你怎么想？
Hey, Ma, you got to rent me a tux!
嘿妈，帮我租件礼服！
Right now? What kind of sex are you having up there?
现在？你们在上面玩啥花样呢？
Why are you crouching there? This is my spot. Where else am I supposed to crouch? I don't know. Texas?
你干嘛蹲在这？这是我的地儿啊。我还能蹲哪。不知道，德州？
Here you go. Fresh from the cleaners, good as new. Really? Great. Sheldon, look. Good as new.
来了，刚拿回来的焕然一新。真的啊？太好了谢尔顿，看看，跟新的一样。
From that key maker, I highly doubt it.
从配钥匙的那儿，我严重质疑。
Come on, Sheldon. Just give it a try. All right. There, nice and comfy cozy. Zero, zero, zero.
好了谢尔顿，试试看嘛。好吧。好了，舒适惬意安逸，000。
There's one more zero. You forgot the time parameter. Sit on the damn couch.
少了个0，你把时间参数忘了。坐你的沙发吧。
Nope. What do you mean, "nope"? What's wrong with it? Nothing, it's what's wrong with him.
不对。－啥意思啊不对？有什么问题？没问题，有问题的是他。
It's exactly the same...Penny, Penny, I think I know what to do. Sheldon, I have some bad news.
完全是同一...佩妮佩妮，我想我知道该怎么办了。谢尔顿我有坏消息。
More? I'm afraid so. You know the cashew chicken I get you on Monday nights?
还有啊？恐怕是的。记得每周一晚上我给你买的腰果鸡丁吗？
Yes. From Szechuan Palace. Szechuan Palace closed two years ago.
是的。川府菜馆买的嘛。川府菜馆两年前就关门了。
What? Whe did my cashew chicken come from? Golden Dragon.
什么？那我的腰果鸡丁哪来的？－金龙餐馆。
No. No, this isn't right. Our food always comes in Szechuan Palace containers.
不。不，这可不对啊。我们的菜一直是用川府的餐盒装的。
Yeah, well, before they went out of business, I bought 4,000 containers. I keep them in the trunk of my car.
他们关门前，我买了4000个餐盒，放在我车的后备箱里。
But... Oh, this changes everything.
但...一切都变了。
I thought that might take his mind off the cushion.
我觉得可以让他忘了垫子的事。
What's real? What isn't? How can I know? You did make that up, right? Oh, God, I wish I had.
什么是真的？什么不是？我怎么知道？你瞎编的是吧。哦老天，我倒希望是。
Leonard? Yeah, buddy? I still don't like this cushion.
兰纳德？嗯伙计？我还是不喜欢这垫子。
OK, first of all, Penny, thank you for coming. Thanks for the shoes.
好了，首先佩妮谢谢你能来。谢谢你的鞋。
Penny is an amazing shot. I think we have a real chance to win this week.
佩妮是神枪手，我看这周我们赢面很大。
What's the plan? Okay. Now, we all run out. Sheldon and I will cut to the left behind these trees.
计划呢？这样，现在我们都跑出去，谢尔顿和我切到左边树后面。
Raj, Howard and Leslie flank to the right behind the rocks.
拉什霍华德和莱斯莉守在右侧石头后
Then we'll all have a great view as Penny runs out and kills everyone else in sight.
佩妮出来将视线中的敌人一举歼灭时我们将有非常好的视线。
Just one thing before we start. What is it, Sheldon?
开战前还有一件事。什么事谢尔顿？
What the hell? That was for my cushion. Sheldon, Penny was our only hope.
搞什么啊？这下是为了我的垫子。谢尔顿，佩妮是我们唯一的希望。
I'm sorry, Leonard. But revenge is a dish best served cold.
抱歉兰纳德，但君子报仇十年不晚。
Screw that. She can't shoot me. She's dead. He's right. You can't.
去你的。她不能打我的，她死了呀。他说的对，你不能开枪。
Well, if we're going to descend into anarchy...
要是真想混乱下去的话...
Okay, see you. Where are you going? Surrender, then Denny's.
好吧，再见。你们去哪？投降，然后去丹尼斯餐馆吃饭。