We have a great show for you tonight.
今晚的节目很精彩
But first we need to talk about what is going on in the news.
首先我们来聊聊新闻
That is that former congressman Anthony Weiner quit twitter today
前国会议员安东尼·威纳尔被曝出给某位不是他妻子的女性发送性暗示照片
after he was caught sending suggestive sexual photos to a woman who is not his wife.
今天宣布退出推特
Now why does he keep doing it?
为什么他老做这种事啊
Three times, like the entire world has already seen his penis.
都三次了 几乎全世界都见过他的生殖器了
But now he should just text a girl and go Google anything about me the past three years,
现在他给女孩子发短信的时候完全可以写 在谷歌上搜我的名字 找过去三年的文章
look at the images. This is one of the photos that Weiner sent.
然后看里面的图就行 这张是威尔纳发过的图之一
How is that the photo he went with?
他怎么会发这个
Like no one ever sends the first selfie, right, no one sends the first,
第一张图没人会发自拍的吧 不是吗
that has to be like the third picture he took.
这应该作为第三张才对
How do you look at that picture and go yep, I'm going to get in the bone zone, let's do it.
你看了这张 怎么还会觉得想看下面 是吧
I feel like I've seen that face somewhere before. Right.
我觉得这张脸我在哪里见过 没错就是他
The other big story, the other big story from the weekend was that the MTV video music awards happened last night.
本周还有个大新闻 就是昨晚的MTV音乐大奖
If you don't know what the VMAs are, they are the annual world show, an MTV showcase
以防有人不知道VMA是什么 它是一个颁奖典礼 会选出最好的MV
best and brightest in music videos and makes you feel very old.
同时这个颁奖典礼会让你觉得自己很老
They literally called Britney Spears, the legendary Britney Spears.
他们把布兰妮·斯皮尔斯叫做传奇歌手布兰妮·斯皮尔斯

She's 34 years old. I'm 38.
要知道她才34岁呢 我都38岁了
If I was on the VMAs they would have brought me on stages alike the almost dead James Corden.
如果我去参加 他们说不定要叫我半只脚踏进棺材的 詹姆斯·柯登
Speaking of Britney, she got a fabulous performance and she came out in silhouettes. Here's a pic.
说到布兰妮 她的表演非常精彩 出场时是一道剪影 请看这张图
I don't know, I think she ripped that entrance off because that's the same entrance
我觉得这个出场方式是在模仿别人
Donald Trump made at the republican convention last month. Look.
因为上个月唐纳德·特朗普在共和党议会上也是这么出场的 看
I mean when you think about it, it's crazy that they have the same entrance.
仔细想想就会觉得很疯狂
One of those people could be president one day and the other is Donald Trump.
这两个人中 有一个未来会成为总统 而另一个是唐纳德·特朗普
Now undoubtedly the best performance—
毫无疑问 全场最佳表演——
The best performance far and away of the night, last night was
当天全场最佳表演来自碧昂斯新专辑柠檬水的
Beyonce's 15 minute medley of songs from her brilliant album lemonade.
15分钟歌曲串烧
Powerful, I mean that—that performance went on for 15 minutes and 37 men died.
非常有力的一击 这场表演持续了15分钟 死了37个人
Coincidentally, that's exactly what Anthony Weiner's wife did to him this afternoon.
巧的是 安东尼·威尔纳的妻子今天下午也对维尔纳做了同样的事
Finally Kayne West, of course, made an appearance on the show, Kayne rambled on for five minutes last night.
当然最后坎耶·韦斯特也现身了 他在舞台上东拉西扯讲了5分钟
People are saying he rambled for five minutes. He was on stage for five minutes.
大家说的是讲了5分钟 他确实是在舞台上待了5分钟
He really only spoke for about 90 seconds. Mostly it was a lot of this.
实际上讲话的时间只有90秒 大部分时间他都是这样的
I mean this was an ironic moment it was the one time we could have used Kayne West to come up and interrupt Kayne West. Let me finish！
这很讽刺 这是第一次我们把坎耶请上台 还能成功地打断他的 让我说完
After all that, he finally premiered his new video for his song fade. Here's a little taste of it.
最后 他首次放出了自己的新歌渐行渐远的MV 这里是其中一小段
I feel it. Your love is fade.
我感觉到了 你的爱在渐行渐远
Now most of it is just that woman dancing but then at the end it gets really weird.
其中大部分时间是这个女人在跳舞 但最后一幕很奇怪
Where like a strange image of her with a cat's face.
因为后面这个女人的脸变成了一张猫脸
Look it was like—I feel like MTV was like this is way too suggestive and Kayne is like
我觉得应该是MTV告诉坎耶这块的那啥意味太浓了 坎耶说
I know, what if she has a cat face, at the end now it's art, boom, fixed it.
明白 那就给她换成猫脸怎么样 然后这就成了艺术 搞定