Honest Headlines
正确的标题
Is that the best you could come up with for that?
你最好只能做到这样吗
We rehearsed this earlier.
我们之前排练过啊
I know it will come as a shock that we rehearse the show,
我知道你们可能对我们还排练这个很惊讶
but we rehearsed it and Reggie said, this is Honest Headlines, and Reggie went, jingles-a-come.
但我们确实排练了 雷吉的台词是 这里是正确的标题 叮叮当
And that was like three hours ago and what you came up with was Honest Headlines.
这是三个小时之前的事 然后你现在就只有这个吗
I like it. Any thoughts, Guillermo, on the band name?
我喜欢 吉列尔莫 你对乐队名字有什么想法吗
No. No, nothing. All right.
没有 没有 没有任何意见 行
So these are new stories. The headlines don't always tell you what the story is.
我们这里有几条新闻 新闻标题总是无法准确的告知你发生了什么事
These are honest headlines. I don't know what's going on.
我们会给大家讲述正确的标题 不知道怎么回事
Okay. This first story comes from ABC News, right,
第一条来自ABC新闻
and the headline read: 72 year old woman survived nine days in Arizona wilderness, OK.
标题是 72岁老人在亚利桑那州大荒漠中坚持九天后获救
But the honest headline should have been, heartless family doesn't realize grandma's missing for nine whole days. That's the story.
正确的标题应该是 没心没肺的家人整整九天后才发现奶奶不见了 这才是正确的标题

Here's a story we saw from NBC New York,
还有一条来自NBC纽约的新闻
the headline said: Mom has meltdown at Laguardia airport over 12-hour delay, right,
标题是一位母亲在拉呱迪亚机场发飙延误登机12小时
but the honest headline should have read: Dad spends 12 hours saying, 'I know! No, I know! You're right honey, I know!'
正确的标题应该是 父亲花了112小时解释 我知道 是的 我明白 你说的对亲爱的
No, I know. I know!
我知道 我知道
Here's a story from the New York Daily News, the New York Daily News said:
还有一条来自纽约日报
Astronomers come up with laser cloak idea to hide earth from illegal aliens.
宇航员提出使用激光防护罩抵挡不法外星人
The headlines should have just read, astronomers try weed for the first time.
正确的标题应该是 宇航员初尝大麻体验
We saw this one, this was on Yahoo News the other day, the headline on Yahoo News said:
我们前几天还在雅虎上看到这样一条 说
Ruh roh! Owners return home to discover mischievous dog found their calligraphy ink.
哇哦 主任回家后发现调皮的狗在家里弄满了墨迹
And the honest headline should've just said: Slow news day.
而正确的标题应该是今天讲旧闻
And here's one more from Yahoo News, the headline read: Arnold Schwarzenegger's 18-year-old son looks just like him.
雅虎还有一条 阿诺德·施瓦辛格18岁的儿子跟他真的长得很像
But the honest headline should've been: Journalism officially dead.
但正确的新闻标题应该是 新闻业已死
We just reported that a son looks like his father.
我们刚刚报道的新闻居然是儿子长得像爸爸