Ladies and gentlemen, the South Carolina primary is on Saturday
女士们先生们 本周六南卡罗来纳州的初选即将举行
and the candidates are doing everything they can to get noticed.
候选人们都尽可能的在吸引更多人的目光
Now Jeb Bush hasn't been doing too well in the primaries.
初选中杰布·布什的表现并不尽如人意
He finished fourth in New Hampshire
在新罕布什尔州他选票排名第四
but yesterday it seemed like he had finally changed his image
但昨天 他完全改变了自己的形象
and summed up his vision for America in a single tweet.
发了一条推文总结了自己对美国前景的展望
Here's the tweet.
推文是这样的
It is a gun with his name on it, and the caption just says America.
一把枪上刻着自己的名字 配文 美国
Although he could have just captioned it, now will you like me?
我觉得他的配文完全可以写 现在你喜欢上我了吗
I can't believe he had his name engraved on the gun.
我简直不敢相信 他居然把自己的名字刻在一把枪上面

Although to be fair, Jeb Bush looks like its type of person who puts his name on literally everything.
但说实话 杰布·布什看起来的确像那种会把所有东西都刻上自己名字的人
You know what I mean? Like he's got a label maker.
你们知道我意思吗 他就像个贴标签的狂热爱好者
If you look inside his fridge, you see like Jeb's Pepsi.
如果你打开它的冰箱 你会看见杰布的百事可乐
Jeb's cheese, keep off.
杰布的奶酪 勿动
But Jeb, if you are running for president and you want to post a picture of guns,
但杰布 如果你想当总统 你又想贴一张枪的照片
you do it the way speak of the house Paul Ryan did it.
你真应该跟众议院议长保罗·莱恩学学
There's some guns. There is some guns for you.
这儿有几把枪 专门为你准备的
But I mean Jeb is making a lot of changes, his new gun-toting image isn't the only change.
但杰布也做了其他改变 不仅仅是带枪而已
After saying he would never ditch his glasses this week Jeb appeared wearing contact lenses.
他之前说过 永远都会带着框架眼镜 结果这周他就带上了隐形眼镜
And I have to say, the new look really suits his tuferrer image.
不得不说 这个表情实在很符合他的硬汉形象
Most people actually do look cooler without glasses.
大部分人都是不戴眼镜会更酷一点
Jeb looks like a turtle who has lost his shell.
而杰布不戴眼镜的时候就像只丢了壳的乌龟
Also, like, is anyone else worried that Jeb got rid of his glasses the same week he got a gun?
有人会担心杰布在开始用枪的同时 又弄丢了眼镜这件事吗
It feels like someone is about to get shot.
感觉像是随时会有人中枪
But Jeb's reinvention has left a really bad taste in everyone's mouth, particularly Hillary Clinton.
杰布的新形象也让很多人难受 特别是希拉里·克林顿
Take a look at what happened at a recent campaign event.
看看最近一次竞选中的情况
Inmates—representing—thank you, Hazel.
居民——代表——谢谢 黑兹尔
Thank you, hazel.
谢谢 黑兹尔
She's clearly not very well.
很明显 她的身体状况并不太好
But we have more footage of her at another event.
我们这还有另一场竞选活动时的录像
And I'm sorry to say her cough has actually taken a turn for the worse.
很遗憾的 她的咳嗽越来越严重了
I feel like we should explain, we should explain what she is barking like a dog
我本来是想解释 她为什么在学狗叫的
But a, we don't have time and b, it's just funnier if we don't.
但是一 我们没时间 二 我们觉得不解释更好玩
But with Jeb's waffling and Hillary's barking,
杰布让人摸不着头脑 希拉里学狗叫
it seems like running for president just drives you crazy.
感觉竞选总统会把人逼疯
Now luckily Barack Obama is still talking sense,
幸运的是巴拉克·奥巴马还是很清醒的
here is what he said when asked if Donald Trump could be president.
当问到他觉得唐纳德·特朗普是否会成功当选总统时 他是这么说的
I continue to believe Mr. Trump will not be president.
我仍然相信特朗普先生不会当选总统
And the reason is because I have a lot of faith in the American people.
因为我对美国人民很有信心
Yes, finally.
对 终于有人说出这话了
A president with faith in his citizens.
这是一位愿意相信国民的总统
You know, I trust everything this guy says.
这个人说的每一句话 我都相信
And I think they recognize that being president is a serious job.
我觉得 他们会意识到总统是一份很严肃的工作
It's not hosting a talk show.
并不是像主持脱口秀一样
Okay, right, what? What?
好吧 啥 你说什么来着
Why was that the first job you mentioned as a nonserious job right there?
为什么你一说到不严肃的工作 第一个提到的就是主持脱口秀
What about a clown or Elvis impersonators or the guy who djs at the zoo?
你为什么不说是小丑或者埃尔维斯的扮演者 或是在动物园放音乐的也好啊
You know what I mean, like hosting a show isn't easy, Mr. President, right.
你知道吗 主持脱口秀可是很不容易的啊 总统先生
You dress up as a pinata on Cinco de Mayo and have LL Cool J whack you with a baton
你要五月五日节的时候 穿着皮纳塔的衣服 让酷J用棍子打你
and then tell me it isn't serious.
你跟我说这还不严肃
Look at that. Can you do that?
你们看 你们能做到吗
I don't think so.
我觉得不行
Still bruised.
我伤口还没长好呢
Bruised like a peach.
屁股肿得跟桃子一样