This is from Shannon from Falls City, Washington. How was your weekend?

这个来自华盛顿福尔斯城 周末过得怎么样？

Good. Went to a farm, did some yard work, had a donut, F'ed some goats.

挺好 去了农场 干了些农活 吃了个甜甜圈 干了些山羊

Um, fed. Not F'ed.

嗯 是喂 不是干

Please do not F goats, you guys. It's not right.

请不要干山羊啊你们 那是不对的

This is from Angie from Remington, Indiana.

这个来自印第安纳雷明顿的Angie

Where are you? One more beer, then we're lesbian.

你在哪儿 再来一杯啤酒 我们就是拉拉了

Autocorrect, haha. Leaving.

自动更正 哈哈 走了

Although that is how it happened for me.

不过我就是这么过来的

Oh, boy. This is from Jessica from Shawnee, Kansas.

哦天 这是堪萨斯肖尼的Jessica

What are you up to? Babysitting. Woo.

你要干什么 照看小孩儿

Sitting on the couch, watching a movie, doing homework, eating their food, all while getting laid.

坐在沙发上 看电影 做作业 跟他抢吃的 还被炒鱿鱼了

Oh, no. Haha, I meant paid.

哦不是 哈哈 我是说还有钱拿

Sherry from Saskatoon, Canada. You home yet?

加拿大萨斯卡通的Sherry 你到家了吗

I'm eating lots of penis, so you better stay away. What?

我吃了好多生殖器 所以你最好待远点 什么

OMG. Peanuts, peanuts. Definitely not penis.

哦天哪 花生 花生 绝对不是生殖器

And here's my favorite. This is from Muhammad from New York, New York.

这个是我最爱的 来自纽约的Muhammad

Dad and I fondled ourselves for the first time last night.

我和爸爸昨晚上第一次亲热了

We didn't get good results. Nothing came up. LMAO, mom.

没什么好结果 什么都没有 笑死我了老妈

I don't know what you tried to write, but that's hilarious.

不知道你想说什么 不过太搞笑了

Auto erect. Autocorrect! We googled ourselves. No results.

自动竖立 自动更正 我们谷歌了自己 没有搜索结果

Hey, if you see an auto erect that I should see, please send it to me.

嘿 如果你也看到一些错误的短信 请发给我看