I told you about an Instagram account, it's called "Texts From Your Ex."
我告诉过你们有个照片分享合辑 叫做 奇葩前任的短信
It's a collection of real texts between exes.
它收集了很多真实的前任们的短信
Have you heard about this? It's--it's wonderful, I tell ya.
你听说过这个吗 这 这个很棒的 我跟你们说
And so I want to read some, uh, and this first one is, uh,
所以 我想读几个 呃 这是第一个 呃
someone says, "How are you doing, beautiful? I miss you." "Stop texting me."
有个人说 美女 你最近怎么样啊 我想你了 别再给我发短信了

"Can I call then?" "No, you're in prison.
那我能给你打电话吗 不行 你都进监狱了
"Please stop. Leave me alone. I have a man." "I should be getting out soon."
求你停止吧 别来烦我 我有对象了 我很快就会出来了
Here's another one. "I know I've been a jerk but please hook me up with your friend."
这里还有一个 我知道我是个渣渣 但麻烦帮我勾搭下你朋友呗
Still a jerk. Here's another one. "Do you want to come "to a paintball party with me?
还是个渣渣 这还有一个 你要不要跟我一起 去彩弹球派对啊
"I think it would be very healthy for us to shoot at each other."
我觉得我们互相射击是件好事
And finally, uh, "Love you. "You're just drunk." "No o do." "I do. Bar babe." "Hello?"
最后一个了 爱你 你喝醉了 不 母 喝 我说真的 掰了 宝贝 你还在吗
You can see more "Texts From Your Ex" on Instagram.
你们可以去照片分享查看更多“奇葩前任的短信”