All right, we've defeated the first challenge. Now we must steel ourselves to face the monster who defends the gate.
好了，我们过了第一关。我们现在得硬起来，对抗这个镇守大门的怪兽。
We're trying to get past a security guard, not rescue Zelda.
我们是要避开一个保安，又不是拯救塞尔达[游戏名]。
I think what really needs to be rescued is your sense of whimsy, but one quest at a time. So what's the plan?
我看是你那吊儿郎当的念头才需要拯救，不过现在先解决这件事。所以你的计划是什么？
Uh, I'm just gonna be honest with the guy.
我决定对那个保安实话实说。
Honesty will never get us in. Well, what's your plan?
说实话我们永远进不去。那你的计划是什么？
All right, my plan is predicated on the assumption that they have a nurse's office and your willingness to be lightly stabbed.
我的计划是预估一下里面有医疗室的可能性，以及你同意被小捅一刀的自愿度。
Who are you here to see? Uh, I'm just gonna tell you the truth. Oh, you are killing me.
你们要去拜访谁？我还是实话实说吧。真是要了命了。
We don't have an appointment. We-we're just fans of Mr. Lucas's work, and we thought we'd take a shot and see if we could get in and look around.
我们没有预约。我们是卢卡斯先生的忠实粉丝，我们只想来碰碰运气，您能不能让我们进去看看。
Sorry, guys, we get this a lot. Can't let you in.
抱歉各位，这样的人我们见多了。我不能让你们进去。
What if I told you that I was the voice of Yoda? A recording session I must attend.
如果我告诉你我就是尤达的配音呢？我必须进去参加一场配音会议。
I'm sorry, don't listen to him. We're actually physicists. We're giving a lecture at Berkeley later today. We just...we had some time to kill.
对不起，别理他。我们其实是物理学家，我们一会儿要去伯克利分校上课。我们只是想消磨一下时间。
Hey, listen, you seem like decent guys. I can't let you in, but I got some hats and T-shirts I can give you.
我说，你们看上去也是体面的人。我不能让你们进去，但我可以送你们一些帽子和纪念T恤。
Thank you so much. See? Maybe honesty is the best...What are you doing?
非常感谢你。看到没？诚实才是最宝贵的...你在干什么呢？
Shedding the yoke of my oppressors, you blind, sad little man.
当然是挣脱那束缚我的枷锁，你这个无知可悲的小矮子。
Don't move! Code AA-23, AA-23. Copy.
不许动！代号AA23 AA23。收到。
I can see the ranch, Leonard! Oh, it's rustic, it's lovely.
我看到牧场了，莱纳德！充满了乡村气息，真美啊。
I'd take a picture, but people are chasing me. I'm gonna make it...! I'm gonna make it! They have Tasers, but they wouldn't dare use...
我想拍个照片，可是好多人在追我。我就要成功了！我就要成功了！他们有脉冲电击枪，可他们肯定不敢...
Come on, Raj. You are the King Kong of PingPong. You are the menace of table tennis. Put her away, 'cause I don't have a third one. Yes!
拉杰，加油。你是乒乓届的金刚。你是桌球届的霸王。赶紧灭了她，我想不出第三句了。
Rajesh eight, Penny four. Sorry, he's really good.
太好了！拉杰8分，佩妮4分。抱歉，他实在是太强了。
Hey, Raj. if Howard can't keep the TARDIS, how great would it look at your place?
拉杰。如果霍华德不能留着塔迪斯，把它放在你家会不会很酷啊？
What? Yeah, what?
什么？对啊，什么？
I don't know much about Doctor Who, but if, um, you were to put this right outside your front door and open up the back,
我对《神秘博士》了解不多，但是如果你把它放在大门外面再把后门跟你家大门打开，
it would be like your entire apartment was the inside of the TARDIS, which is pretty cool 'cause on the show, the inside of the TARDIS is bigger than the outside.
你的整个公寓就仿佛变成了塔迪斯的内部。很酷对不对？因为在电视剧里，时间机器的内部的确比外观大得多。
But then again, I don't know much about Doctor Who.
但话说回来，我对《神秘博士》了解并不多。
Don't listen to her. You and I go way back, we're like brothers.
别听她的。我们俩交情似海深，兄弟如手足啊。
We are. We are. Oh, no! What a terrible serve! Sorry, brother. Eight-five.
没错，没错。哎呀，人家发球太烂了！抱歉了，手足。8比5。
This is ridiculous. I want a new champion. Amy, were you serious about being able to serve?
这太无耻了，我要换选手。艾米，你说你会发球是真的吗？
Uh, it-it's been a long time. I don't know. I'm probably pretty rusty.
那已经是很久以前的事了。我也没把握，我的技术可能都荒废了。
Wow. She's my champion! Well, if you can switch champions, so can I.I want Raj. Hey.
哇哦。她才是我的新选手！如果你可以换，我也可以。我选拉杰。喂。
Oh, come on, like you even care. I care! Oh, wait, no, I don't. Good luck, Raj.
拜托，好像你介意似的。我是介意啊！等等，我才不介意呢。加油吧，拉杰。
You know, I thought our friendship meant more to you. So did I.
我以为我们的友情对你来说更重要呢。我也这么以为。
Do you think they're gonna call the police? I don't know.
你觉得他们会通报警察吗？我不知道。
Maybe they'll call Imperial Officers to take us to a holding cell on the Death Star.
也许他们会通报帝国警察，然后把我们关进死星里的小牢房吧。
Oh, I think that's below the pay grade of an Imperial Officer. Stormtroopers are really the ones who...Oh, shut up.
帝国警察才不会屈尊来处理这种事呢。暴风部队真正的职能是...闭嘴吧你。
He's right. Uh, Stormtroopers actually combine both the function of infantry and military police.
他说得对。暴风部队其实兼负了步兵和宪兵两种职能。
Uh-huh, I'm normally very nice, but you shut up, too.
我这人一般挺和善的，但你也给我闭嘴吧。
So...what are you in for?
话说...你是为什么进来的？
Honestly, I just wanted to meet Mr. Lucas and say thank you. You know, growing up, the movies had such an impact on my life.
我只是想见见卢卡斯先生，向他致谢。这电影在我成长之路上意义重大。
I never really fit in anywhere. Till I discovered the worlds he created and finally found a place where I belong.
我这人在哪里都不合群，直到我发现了他创造的世界，才终于找到了属于我的地方。
But why are you here?
但你怎么会在这里呢？
Oh, I, uh, I hopped a fence, and they caught me in the sculpture gallery making out with a Chewbacca statue.
我...我翻过了栏杆，结果他们抓到我在雕像馆和一个楚巴卡雕塑亲热。
Excuse me. Leonard, they have a sculpture gallery.
失陪一下。莱纳德，里面还有雕像馆呢。
All right, I talked to my supervisor, and we're gonna let you go with a warning. But if you ever come back, we will call the police and press charges.
我跟我的上司汇报了，我们这次只给你们一个警告。不过如果你们还敢来，我们会报警并起诉你。
We understand. Thank you so much. Uh, what about me?
我们明白。非常感谢。那我呢？
No, you're not going anywhere, kissy face. Let's go. I have to take your picture to post at the guard gate.
你哪里也不能去，接吻狂魔。来吧。我要给你们拍照贴在大门外。
Uh, one question about that picture. Can it be with George Lucas? Ooh, grumpy you are.
关于照片我有个问题：我能跟乔治·卢卡斯一起拍吗？好凶巴巴哦。
Okay, this is the match that decides it all. First to 11 wins. Serve switches every five points.
好了，现在是最终对决。先得十一分的人赢。每五分换发一次。
And just so you know, when this started, I was going to put the TARDIS in a discreet corner of the house,
跟你说一声，本来一开始我只是想把塔迪斯放在房子不碍事的角落。
but I've since turned mean, and now it's going right in the middle of the living room on a rotating platform with a sign that says "Suck it". Game on.
可是我现在生气了，所以我会把它摆在客厅的最中间或者放在转台上，并挂着"咬我啊"。比赛开始。
Except...Raj is gonna win. Isn't that right, Raj? Uh, yeah, I mean, her serve was pretty good.
反正拉杰会赢。是不是，拉杰？可是她发球发得不错。
Come on, get in her head. Be intimidating. Okay, uh...I'm gonna own you, bitch!
给点力啊，攻敌先攻心。气势上先压倒她。好吧...我会虐爆你的，贱人！
Whoa! Hey! That's not nice. Let's just play.
说什么呢！嘿！太过分了。我们还是开始吧。
One-zero. Two. Three. Four. Five-nothing. Wait, did you play badminton or sad-minton?
一比零。二。三。四。五比零。等等，你以前打的是羽毛球还是羽毛糗？
Don't listen to him, all she's got is a serve. Now, grab a fresh tampon and put her away.
别听他的，她就只有发球好。去换个新卫生棉条再来干掉她。
Wha...? AAnd that's not offensive? Where's the line? It's in your purse. Play.
啥？这话就不过分吗？标准到底在哪？在你的女用皮包里。赶紧打。
One-five. Two-five. Three-five. Four-five. Five-five!
一比五。二比五。三比五。四比五。五比五！
Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten-five! Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten-ten!
六。七。八。九。十比五！六。七。八。九。十比十！
Well, that was an exciting 40 seconds.
刚才那四十秒真是激动人心啊。
It was, and now the serve is back to you, and the game is over.
的确是，不过现在回到你发球了，游戏要结束了。
You know, Amy, I, uh...can't help but wonder how Sheldon would react if the TARDIS was at your place.
你知道吗，艾米，我...我一直在想要是塔迪斯在你家，谢尔顿会有什么反应。
Don't listen to her, just hit the ball. Keep talking.
别听她的，快发球。继续说。
If this doesn't get him into your bedroom, nothing will. Are you still mad at me? Yes.
如果连这个都不能拐他进你闺房，也没有别的可以了。你还在生我气吗？对。
We missed our lecture, we were almost arrested, and you got me locked in a room with a man who forced his tongue down the throat of a stuffed Wookie.
我们没赶上演讲，差点被拘捕，你还害我跟一个强行把舌头塞进伍基人玩偶喉咙里的男人关在一起。
Boy, some people are just glass-half-empty.
杯子半空的悲观人儿啊。
The glass is empty, Sheldon. It's completely empty. If you gave that glass to a man who was dying of thirst, he would be dead, do you know why?
杯子是全空的好吗，谢尔顿。完全是空的。如果你把那杯子给一个快要渴死的人他就死定了。你知道为什么吗？
Before I answer, was he a smoker? I think you're looking at this all wrong.
我先问一下，他抽烟吗？我觉得你看待事情的角度不对。
Fine, then tell me how I should be looking at it.
好吧，那你告诉我我应该怎么看待这件事。
Well, not only did we go to Skywalker Ranch, we got in. And no one we know can say that.
我们不仅到了天行者农场，还进到里面了。我们认识的人里没人做到过。
And for all the times you find me irritating, today you got to watch someone shoot me with a Taser.
而且你不是一直觉得我很烦人吗，今天你终于看到有人电击我了。
That part was pretty good. See? You did flop around a lot.
这部分是不错。是吧？你被电到满地抽抽啊。
I'll take your word for it. I was too busy trying not to defecate.
这一点我承认。我当时正忙着不让自己尿出来。
You know, when they were escorting us to the detaining room, I looked through a door, and I'm pretty sure I saw a display case with the Ark of the Covenant.
话说他们带我们去拘留室的时候，我看进一扇门。我很确定我看到了一个展示台，里面装着约柜[圣物]。
That's amazing. I know.
太神奇了。就是啊。
And I saw Jabba the Hutt riding by on a motorcycle. Although that was right after the Tasing, so who can say for sure?
我还看到赫特人贾巴骑着摩托车经过呢。不过那时我刚被电过，所以我也不确定是真是假。
II guess this could count as an adventure.
我觉得我们这可以算是一场冒险。
It was. And even though we're not allowed back there, they can never take today away from us.
确实是。而且虽然他们禁止我们再去，但却夺不走我们今天的经历。
Unlike my sense of smell, which hasn't returned since the Tasing. No, I got nothing.
但不包括我的嗅觉，被电击完到现在还没恢复呢。不，什么都闻不到。
Amy, the Daleks are right on my tail! Quick, we need to reset the time circuits. Oh, no, I left my sonic screwdriver behind.
艾米，戴立克正追着我跑呢！快，我们得回去重设时间线。不，我忘拿我的音速起子了。
Really should have thought this through.
我当时真应该好好考虑。