I love that you take pride in your looks, even when I have to pee in the morning, and you're in there spending an hour on your hair.
我喜欢你总喜欢精心打扮，就算是我早上尿急的时候，你也能在厕所花费1小时梳头。
I love that you're too good to pee in the kitchen sink.
我喜欢你太娇贵不肯在厨房水槽尿尿的态度。
I love that you have the confidence to speak, even without giving it an ounce of thought.
我喜欢你有完全不过脑子就高谈阔论的那种自信。
And I love how your hair is always on the soap. It's like washing myself with a hamster.
我喜欢你头发全都沾在香皂上，搞得我像捏着只仓鼠洗澡一样。
Hey, guys. Sorry I am so late. I was on the phone with my mother.
两位，抱歉我来晚了。我刚才跟我妈通电话呢。
Oh, how is she?
她怎么样了？
Pretty good. She bought the book Eat, Pray, Love and used it to set my father's Mercedes on fire. So, what's up with you guys?
还不错。她买了本《饭·祷·爱》，然后用它把我爸的奔驰烧了。你们俩在干嘛呢？

We're just saying all the things we love about each other.
我们在聊喜欢对方的哪些地方。
Oh, like you and I did at couples therapy.
哇，咱俩在伴侣心理治疗时也做过。
Ooh, what'd you get?
你买了什么啊？
Oh, I ordered it before your surgery. It's the urn I was going to put you in.
我在你手术前订的，是准备安置你的骨灰坛。
Okay, that's morbid. Send it back.
这太变态了。把它退回去。
I can't send it back. I had it engraved. "Here lie the ashes of Leonard Hofstadter. He thought he was right, but his roommate knew better."
这不能退货，我字都刻好了。"莱纳德·霍夫斯塔德长眠于此。他自以为是，却不及室友睿智。"
That's funny. Boy, I'm gonna miss these painkillers.
这个好笑。老天，我会想念这些让人嗨的止痛药。
Hey, why did you get two? "I'm with stupid." - Oh, that one's mine.
你干嘛买两个？"我旁边那货是笨蛋。" -那个是我的。