不和其他人一样

1. Don’t act like other people.
Everyone is unique and beautiful. That should make us incredibly happy. Yet, I run into a lot of people who mimic the supposedly “cool kids.” You don’t need to emulate others to find happiness. We are all cool kids with our own interests.
1、不用和其他人一样。
每一个人都是独特和美丽的。这一点就应当令我们感到难以置信的幸福。然而，我遇到过很多模仿那些所谓“酷孩子”的人。你并不需要通过模仿他人而获得幸福。我们都是拥有自己兴趣的酷孩子。

不购买个性

2. Don’t buy your identity.
How many times have you run out to the store and purchased the latest “in-style” shirt? It’s easy to get sucked into consumer culture and what we think is “stylish.” To some extent we can’t avoid being influenced by culture, but we don’t have to buy into the messaging. Constantly questioning your choices will help you figure out your principles and preferences.
2、不要购买自己的个性。
你有多少次会跑到商店购买最新款的时尚衬衣？我们很容易就会被吸入消费文化以及那些我们认为的“时尚”之中。在某种程度上，我们无法避免不受文化的影响，但是我们并不需要购买这些信息。不断地怀疑自己的选择将帮助你弄清楚自己的原则和喜好。

宽以待人

3. Cut people some slack.
After 10 years of working with rape and domestic violence victims, I’ve learned a lot about people. And one of the most important lessons I learned is: cut people some slack. You have no idea what kind of trauma people walk around with on a daily basis. If your co-worker is being a punk, then cut that person some slack. There is probably a deeper reason why that individual is in a bad mood or not treating you kindly.
The only person you can change is yourself. Be mindful and don’t snap, bicker or be mean to others. That type of behavior won’t bring you happiness or make the world a better place.
3、宽以待人。
经过与强奸和国内暴力犯罪的受害人一起工作10年后，我对人了解得更深了。其中，我学到的最重要的一个教训就是：放人一马。你并不知道每日打照面的人曾受过何种创伤。如果你的同事是一个朋克，那就不要太追究。那个人心情不好或对你不够友善很可能是有更深的原因。
你唯一可以改变的人只有自己。要注意不要谩骂，争吵或对人刻薄。那种行为不会给你带来幸福或使这个世界变得更好。

学会给予

4. Learn how to give.
Giving might look different for everyone. But give all the time you’ve got. Pour yourself into projects and give back to your friends, family and community.
For instance, if you blog, help out your fellow bloggers. Highlight their work, give encouragement and help your blogging buddies improve. If you’re into volunteer work, take it up an extra notch and increase the number of hours you give to an organization every week.
Learning how to give and be grateful for everyday gifts is an essential component to finding yourself and happiness.
4、学会给予。
给予对每一个人来说可能都有不同含义。但是你应将所有的时间都拿来给予。用心工作并回报朋友、家庭和社会。
例如，如果你写博客，那就帮助写博客的同伴，突出他们的工作，提出鼓励，并帮助你的朋友进步。如果你正参与志愿者工作，那就争取做得更好并增加每周志愿服务的时间。
学会如何给予并对每一天的礼物深怀感激，这是找到自己和幸福的一个重要组成部分。

亲近自然

5. Spend time in nature.
I’ve seen a few credit card advertisements with people frolicking in green fields. Credit card companies seem to know what brings us happiness and that is spending time outside in nature. However, running up credit card bills won’t give you the time to enjoy green fields or hikes in nature. More than likely, you’ll be stuck in a cubicle, working to pay off your debt.
5、亲近自然。
我看到过一些信用卡广告里面人们在绿色田野中嬉闹。信用卡公司看起来知道什么会给我们带来幸福，那就是花些时间享受户外的自然。然而，累积信用卡账单并不会给你享受绿色田野或在野外远足的时间。更可能的是，你会不得不待在小方格子里拼命工作以还清欠款。

找到生活的意义

6. Find meaning and purpose in your life.
Last weekend, I spent some time in Orange County and talked with a few family members about dreams and lifestyle changes. One of my family members has no idea what to do next with her life. This made me incredibly sad. I encouraged her to do some mind-mapping and write down everything she wants to do.
Don’t become a zombie. Finding meaning, purpose and happiness isn’t easy. It’s a journey we all have to figure out, but it is possible if we prioritize happiness in our lives.
Determine the biggest and most important problem you can solve with your skills. And use that gift to find meaning, purpose and happiness in your life. We all have unique skills and gifts. Once you figure out what those gifts are apply them to a problem you care deeply about.
6、找到生活的意义和目的。
上周，我花了一些时间待在奥兰治县与一些家庭成员谈论梦想和生活方式的改变。我的一个家人并不知道下一步该做什么。这令我非常伤心。我鼓励她做一些心智图并写下她想做的所有事。
不要成为僵尸。找到生活的意义、目的和幸福并不容易。这是我们所有人必经的旅途，但如果我们将幸福置于生活中的优先位置，这仍是可能的。
确定通过你的技能你可以解决的最大和最重要的难题，然后使用这个天赋来找到生活的意义、目的和幸福。我们都拥有独特的技能和天赋。一旦你弄清楚这些天赋，使用它们解决你最关心的问题。

知足常乐

7. Learn to be satisfied with enough.
What is your enough point? How much do you really need to be happy. A number of researchers studying positive psychology have determined that people don’t need much to be happy after their basic needs are met. Happiness is found by expressing our values and connecting with others. Happiness is not for sale at the shopping mall.
7、知足常乐。
什么是你的满足点？你需要多少才能幸福？一些研究积极心理的学者指出，在人们基本需要得到满足后，并不需要太多的东西才能感动幸福。幸福是通过表现我们的价值和与其他人联络体现的。幸福更不是在商场中可以买到的。

沉思

8. Meditate and let go.
A RowdyReader left a beautiful comment on my last post about happiness and emphasized the importance of mediation and letting go.

What is interesting about this exploration of “Finding Happiness” (not just on your blog) is that many if not all aspects of the solutions point towards letting go of / removing things rather than adding anything. If this is considered deeply (eg through meditation) then it is possible to discover that happiness is actually already here in all of us. And, as your post points out, many aspects of “modern living” obscure happiness from our day-to-day experiences. We are so heavily conditioned to believe that we aren’t happy and need to look for it somewhere outside of our very self. And so heavily conditioned that happiness is something special – like intense pleasure or stimulation of various kinds – but when happiness is present and we experience it, in some ways it is actually very ordinary, and so kind of hard to describe!
8、沉思，然后松手。
一名吵闹的读者在我上次贴出文章后留下了一条关于幸福的美丽的评价，并强调了沉思后放手的重要性。
“关于‘寻找幸福’的探索（不仅仅在你的博客上）有趣的一点是，许多（如果不是全部的话）问题的解决方案都指向放手或拿走，而非增加什么东西。如果深刻考虑的话（比如通过沉思），就可能发现幸福其实就在我们所有人之中。而且，正如你博客所指出的，‘现代生活’的许多方面将幸福从我们每天的经验中隐藏了起来。我们被深深地影响，以至于相信我们不幸福，需要从我们自身以外的地方寻找幸福，并且认为幸福是一种特殊的东西，就像激烈的乐趣或不同种类的刺激。但当幸福就在身边让我们体验时，在某种程度上它又变得非常普通并且难以描述了。”

寻求帮助

9. It’s okay to ask for help.
If you’re feeling lost or confused, ask for help. Have some tea with a friend or family member you admire ask them “what makes you happy”. Its amazing what we can learn from others in our lives. The internet is full of amazing blogs and people. Connect with those folks and start asking questions about happiness, personal growth and living a simpler lifestyle.
9、寻求帮助。
如果你感到迷失或困惑，那就寻求帮助。与你敬佩的家庭成员或朋友喝喝茶，并问他们“什么令你幸福”。在生活中，我们可以从其他人身上学到的东西是惊人的。网络上充满着令人惊奇的博客和人物。与那些人联系并开始提出关于幸福、个人成长和简单生活方式的问题。

终身学习

10. Be a lifelong learner.
Rethinking your perspective is a huge part of finding happiness. If we continually latch onto the same worldview, how can we grow and improve our lives? Rethinking requires discussions, reading and communicating with others and allows us to answer new questions that arise. Life is constantly changing. Having the skills to adapt will foster resilience and happiness.
10、终身学习。
反省自己的观点是找到幸福的重要部分。如果我们只能理解同样的世界观，那我们如何成长，又如何改进我们的生活？反省需要讨论，读书，和其他人交流，并允许我们回答产生的新问题。生活是不停变化的。拥有适应的技能将培育韧性与幸福。

照顾好自己

11. Take care of your mental and physical health.
Figuring out who you are and what makes you happy can’t happen if you’re not taking care of your physical and mental health. You only have one body and mind. Consider the consequences of choices that may jeopardize your health.
11、照顾好自己的心理和生理健康。
如果你不照顾好自己的生理和心理健康的话，你是不可能弄清楚自己是谁以及什么会使自己幸福的。你只有一个身体和心灵。考虑一下可能危害健康的行为的后果吧。

你是谁

12. Who are you?
Derrick Jensen has written extensively about “the subsumption of the individual” and the “conversion of vibrant human beings into automata.” Jensen’s words and ideas are powerful. I agree with many of his points. Especially, when it comes to following our hearts to manifest who we really are.
12、你是谁？
德里克·詹森（Derrick Jensen）曾写作了大量关于“个人的包含”和“活跃的人类向自动机的转变”的文章。詹森的话语和想法铿锵有力。我赞同他的许多观点，特别是提到要从心而动以彰显真正的自己。