Hi everyone and welcome back to your favorite segment Across the Pond with James and Alan.

Hi, everyone.

Hi, everyone.

Aren't you guys excited about the questions I'm going to ask you?

Oh, yes.

Shoot.

So today we are going to mostly be doing the category of home.

Home?

But again like usual there will be a lot of embarrassing or weird situations. And let's see how you will respond both as British or American and also as yourselves.

Ok, embarrassed, I don't get embarrassed.

Well, let's see.

Question number one, you know sometimes when you watch TV with your family, like your parents or your siblings or your kids, and when you're watching TV with your family, you see a couple in this TV series they start to take their clothes off and they begin doing the unmentionable in the bedroom. Being British, Let's start with Alan because I know you would probably be more embarrassed.

How do you know that? I probably would use that time to make a cup of tea or get myself a beer or get myself a glass of wine.

What about James？

Well, If it's my parents, they would make jokes like we haven't tried it that way yet and then proceed to walk out of the room to drink.

WOW, I'm starting to see what is like to be in your family a bit more, James. Okay, question number two, now this is more about other people when you go to other people's home. So someone invites you to their house, and they offer to show you the 500 photographs they took of their holiday somewhere, being American, what would you do?

Shall I get a bottle of wine or two or three？

Would you actually try to get out of it?

Honestly, some people would try to get out of it, but if it's like family，you're kind of obligated to sit through it. If it's your friends, like look at the time, oh I gotta work tomorrow, we've got a busy presentation to prepare for. Thank you for having me. I really gotta go.

And Anlan.

I would, first of all, ask where did you go on holiday and then they would answer and I'll say I had a really bad experience at that place.

Smart.

I wouldn't say what experience is and hopefully that might have changed their mind a little bit.

And how likely is this to happen? I mean for people to do that in America or in the UK that they invite you over and they show you all these hundreds of their travel pics.

Not so often anymore, because they will just put them on Facebook or Instagram now.

It's back in the slide days, yeah?

Yeah, it’s back in the days when people like going on holiday was a real status symbol, so people wanted to show off the fact that they went on holiday; but nowadays…

Grandma will still show the pictures.

Yes, so unless you've gone somewhere really really special, then people won't bother.

I think in Post-COVID, everything everywhere will be special.

Oh, yeah.

People haven’t been traveling around the world for so long.

Anywhere that's not my living room is special to me now.

All right, question number three, this is about your neighbor. You offer to look after a neighbor’s priced tropical fish你要帮他照看热带鱼for the weekend, and your cat has this fish for dinner, being British, being American, what would you do？Let's start with James.

Here's the cat, the fish is slightly used.

Would you not try to make up for it？

Seriously, Americans would probably offer to buy a new fish, but if it's a friend you would joke about it like, sorry my cat ate it, so you can have the cat if you want.

Um… but you will tell the truth, you will let them know this happened and you offer to buy…

Oh yeah, after joking.

I see, what about British.

That's a good question. I probably would just buy a gold fish and then say this is a very unique type of tropical fish that does actually change color and change shape.

It's mostly the same.

Exactly.

I guess you have to paint it.

Well, not even paint it just say this type of fish is particularly special type of tropical fish where it does change if you move its location.

Anlan, was my fish always this small?

Or this color?

Yeah, or this alive?

Well, remind me not let you guys look after my pet.

Next question, question number four, you cook a roast diner for friends and family and someone you've only just met takes the last roast potato without offering it around first. For the audience, let me explain first, based on my experience in the UK, they really do care about the last piece of anything even if it's just potato.什么东西大家一起吃的时候，最后那一块，if you want to eat it, you have to ask, let's confirm with Anlan.

Yes, especially if it's potatoes, we do like potatoes.

But they are so cheap, though.

But it doesn't matter, they taste good. Potatoes are super important.

They are. And they take time to make.

If I do that, for example, I took the last roast potato without asking around what would be the reaction.

My reaction would be, I wouldn't say anything, but I would secretly hate you.

And you would think that's poor manners.

I would think that's terrible manners and everyone else at the table will think it's really bad manners and they'll wait for you to go to toilet…

And talk about me?

Talk about you behind your back.

That is so British. What about Americans? Are you guys a little bit more lenient when it comes to last roast potato?

I would say yeah we are, cuz if you're a guest, you eat the last roast potato，there's not much I'm going to do about it because I cook them for the guests. You are supposed to offer it, that's the polite thing to do, cuz in general，if it's an American roast, to be honest, if you eat that last piece of potato, you’ve been eating a lot.

美国人饭量比较大, if I can get to the bottom of it having the last piece, I probably…

Good on you.

…am a big eater.

But you guys keep saying that I should ask, what should I do in this situation if there's only one potato left and I want to eat it.

Mind if I have the last potato?

Or you offer it to other people, does anyone want this last potato?

But I don't want to offer, if I offer they're gonna eat it.

They undertone it, if you offer it to people, then you want it yourself.

And most people would say oh no, go ahead, you can have it.

What if there's one person say I'll have it.

Let's go split this.

You win some, you lose some.

Ok, so for you guys who are listening to this show always offer even if that's not what you're thinking about, always offer.

No, in America, what is on the table is not what they all have, we keep things in reserve in the kitchen.

So it's not really the last potato, if the other person had it，then I guess the host will bring you a new one.

Yeah, but then you'll be the pig that says ok let me get the second load of food now.

But I think Americans are really like Chinese on this, it’s like they will never run out of food, ever, at a banquet.

That's very comforting.

Question number five, someone comes to stay with you for a night, they said it's going to be a night, three nights later, they still show no sign of leaving. Being British, what would you do? Being American, what would you do? Let's start with James.

Well, you can print up an itemized invoice, talk about all the expenses they have accumulated and start charging rent.

Would you actually go so far as in saying, maybe half jokingly, like I should charge you rent.

Yeah, we would, because you've overstayed your welcome.

Overstay your welcome就超出了人家对你那种善意and what about British people？I'm curious because Anlan is always very uncomfortable or British people generally very polite to the point of their tolerating things they shouldn't be tolerating.

I actually have an example that happening. When I was younger, I was staying with my aunt and uncle, and my aunt and uncle are very very British and they had a guest who actually was an American someone they've known for quite a number of years.

My aunts and uncle they don't live in Britain, they live in another country. And this friend was meant to stay for 2 days and then they ended up staying for 2weeks. And in the end, we were looking at train time tables for her and offering her a ride to the train station.

Dropping hints.

So I think that's probably what we would do.

You wouldn't say it directly, you would drop hints.

No, or you would basically just make up like someone is coming to visit, I think we said that my grandmother was coming to visit. I can't remember actually some of the excuses that we used, it actually didn't work, but eventually she did move on.

Talking about overstaying your welcome I think for Chinese we are perhaps a little bit more subtle, especially the traditional way of thinking, we are closer to British. We have the idea of端茶送客。I think it's they offer you tea usually we just leave it, we talk ,we talk, and then when the host picks up his tea and drink it up, I think in some parts of China this means it's your cue to leave.

That's actually quite different from the UK, we would make people tea and coffee when they arrive, it's a polite thing to do.

Yes, they do make you tea, but if they drink up the tea, if the host drinks the tea up, that means it's your cue to leave.

Well, in America if you're at the end of the party and people start offering you coffee instead of drinks, it’s like move on.

I also remember this standup comedian in Britain that says by the end of the night it's like I know you've had 3 bottles of wine but I think you should drive. All right.