No, see, the liquid-metal termators were created in the future by skynet,
不对，液态金属人是在未来由天网创造，
and skynet was developed by Miles Dyson, but that future no longer exists due to Dyson's death in terminator 2.
而天网是由麦尔斯·丹森开发，但丹森在《终结者2》里死掉，所以这个未来将不存在。
Okay, then riddle me this:
好吧，但你这样想：
Assuming all the good terminators were originally evil terminators created by skynet but then reprogrammed by the future John Connor,
假设所有正义的终结者由天网创造时都是邪恶的，是后来经约翰·康纳之手才改写了程序，
why would skynet, an artificial computer intelligence, bother to create a petite, hot, 17-year-old killer robot?
为什么天网这样一个人工智能电脑，会想到去制造一个苗条性感的17岁机器人杀手？
Skynet is kinky? I don't know.
天网是个色鬼？我不知道。
Artificial intelligences do not have teen fetishes.
人工智能可不会把小屁孩当追星对象。
All right. Wait! They use it to. Bing. too late. I win.
好吧，等等！他们用它来……太迟了，我赢了。
What the hell is that?
那是什么鬼东西？
I don't know, but if cats could sing. they'd hate it, too.
我不知道 但如果猫能唱歌它们也会觉得难听。
Hey, guys! Where you going?
嘿! 伙计们，你们去哪里？
What? We just had to mail some letters and. throw away some chicken.
什么？我们要去寄些信，扔掉些鸡肉。
You'll never guess what just happened.
你们绝对猜不到刚才发生了什么
Oh, I give up. I don't guess.
噢，我放弃。我不会猜。
As a scientist, I reach conclusions based on observation and experimentation.
做为一个科学家，我是通过观察和实验得出结论的。
although as I'm saying this, it occurs to me you may have been employing a rhetorical device rendering my response moot.
尽管我这么说，但我发觉你刚才那句话运用了修辞格导致了我的反驳抗议。
What was that?
什么意思？
Believe it or not, personal growth. What happened?
不管你信不信，这是个人成长的表现。发生了什么事？
All right, remember when i auditioned for that workshop production of rent,
记得我上次去音乐剧<吉屋出租>试镜吗？
but I didn't get it and I couldn't figure out why.
我没有被录取，也想不通为什么。
I have a conclusion based on an observation. No, you don't. No, he doesn't.
我通过观察得出的结论是。不，你没有，不，他没有。
Well, the girl they picked to play Mimi—she dropped out, and they asked me to replace her.
那个被选中扮演Mimi的女孩不干了，他们叫我代替她出演。
Congratulations. What a lucky break.
恭喜你！好幸运呀。
It's not that big a deal, just a one-night showcase, but they invite a lot of casting people and agents. So, you never know.
也不是件大事 只是一个晚上的表演，但是他们邀请了很多选角人和经纪人，你知道会怎样吗。
I think I know. No, you don't. He doesn't.
我想我知道。不，你不知道。他不知道。
It's this friday night at 8:00. You guys want to come? No.
这个周五晚上8点，你们来吗？不。
Because. Friday we are attending a symposium on molecular positronium.
因为……周五我们要参加分子正电子素的研讨会。
I think that's a week from tuesday, at 6:00. No, it's this friday. At 8:00.
我记得是下星期二6点。不 是这个星期五，8点。
Oh, too bad. Well, I got get to rehearsal. See you guys. See you.
噢 真不巧。我要去排练了，回见。回见。
You just lied to Penny. Yes, I did.
你刚刚跟佩妮撒谎了。是的。
And you did it so casually—no rapid breathing, no increase in perspiration.
而你表现得如此随意，脸不红心不跳。
So? So, lack of a physiological response while lying is characteristic of a violent sociopath.
那又怎样？撒谎不眨眼是暴力反社会者的特征。
Sheldon, are you worried about your safety?
Sheldon 你在担心你的人身安全吗？
No, I imagine if you were going to kill me, you'd have done it a long time ago.
不。我想如果你想杀我，估计早就已经把我干掉了。
That's very true.
非常正确。
Leonard? Leonard? Leonard? I need to speak to you.
兰纳德？我得跟你谈谈。
It's 2.00 in the morning! It's important. I highly doubt that. Go away.
现在是凌晨两点呀！很重要。我严重怀疑。走开。
Are you still out there? Yes. What?
你还在？是的。什么事？
You're right; it can wait until morning.
你说的对 我可以等到早上再说
What, what, what, what, what? Never mind.
什么？什么？什么？没事。
I clearly woke you up in the middle of a rem cycle. You're in no state of mind to talk. Sheldon, what is it?
很显然我把你从快速动眼期（睡梦）中叫醒，你根本没状态进行谈话。谢尔顿，什么事？
I'm uncomfortable having been included in your lie to Penny.
被考虑到你对佩妮的谎言我感到很不舒服。
What was i supposed to say?
否则你要我怎么说？
You could have told her the truth.
你可以告诉她真相。
That would have hurt her feelings.
那样做会伤害到她。
Is that a relevant factor? Yes.
这是相关要素？是的。
Then I suppose you could've agreed to go.
那么你就该答应她的邀请。
And what would i have said afterwards?
那然后我怎么说呢？
I would suggest something to the effect of:
我会建议如下：
Singing is neither an appropriate vocation nor avocation for you, and if you disagree,
唱歌对你来说即不是合适的职业也不是合适的爱好，如果你不同意我的观点，
I'd recommend you have a cat scan to look for a tumor pressing on the cognitive processing centers of your brain.
我建议你去照下X光看看你的大脑有没有肿瘤压迫了你的认知处理单元。
I couldn't say that.I would have to say, "you were terrific and I can't wait to hear you sing again."
我不会这么说，我只会说“你太棒了，我等不及想再听你唱一次。”
Why? That's the social protocol. It's what you do when you have a friend who's proud of something they really suck at.
为什么？这叫交际礼仪，当朋友为某件事感到骄傲时就算她真很烂，你也应该这么做。
I was not aware of that.
我还不知道这点。
Well, now you are.
现在你知道了。
All right. Leonard? Yes?
好吧，兰纳德？什么？
When we played chess earlier, you were terrific, and I can't wait to play you again. Good night.
之前我们下国际象棋，你真的很棒，我等不及想再跟你下一局。晚安。
Leonard? Leonard? Leonard? This would be so much easier if i were a violent sociopath. What?
兰纳德。如果我真是个暴力反社会者就好了。干吗？
I was analyzing our lie, and I believe we're in danger of Penny seeing through the ruse. How?
我分析了我们的谎言 我相信有被Penny会看穿的危险。怎么会？
Simple. If she were to log onto www.socalphysixsgroup.org/activities/other,
很简单，如果她登陆到www.socalphysixsgroup.org/activities/other，
click on "epcoming events,"scroll down to "seminars," download the pdf schedule, and look for the seminar on molecular positronium,
点击"近期活动”拉到下面的“研讨会”，下载PDF时间表，查找分子正电子素研讨会，
well then, bippity, boppity, boo—our pants are metaororally on fire.
然后，噼里啪啦砰，我们就火烧屁股啦。
Well, sir, my trousers will not be igniting today.
好吧 先生 我可不要我的裤子今天着火!
Penny? Penny? Penny? Good morning.
Penny？早上好。
Do you have any idea what time it is?
你知道现在是几点吗？
Of course I do. My watch is linked to the atomic clock in Boulder, Colorado.
我当然知道，我的手表和科罗拉多州。博尔德市的原子钟连在一起，
It's accurate to one-tenth of a second.
精确度达到1/10秒。
But as I'm saying this,it occurs to me that, once again, your question may have been rhetorical.
但正如我说的 我又一次想到，你的问题又运用修辞手法了。
What do you want?
你想怎么样？
Remember how leonard told you we couldn't come to your performance because we were attending a symposium on molecular positronium?
还记得Leonard告诉你 我们不能去看你表演是因为我们要去参加分子正电子素研讨会吗？
I remember "symposium."
我记得“研讨会”。
Yes. well,he lied. Wait. What?
是的。呃，他撒谎了。等等，什么？
He lied, and I'm feeling very uncomfortable about it.
他撒谎了，而且我因此感到很不舒服。
Well, imagine how I'm feeling.
想象看我的感觉。
Hungry? Tired? I'm sorry, this really isn't my strong suit.
饥饿？疲劳？对不起，我真的不擅长这个。
You told her I lied? Why would you tell her I lied?
你告诉她我撒谎了？你为什么要告诉她啊？
To help you. I'm sorry, I'm not seeing the help.
为了帮助你。对不起 我没看到有什么帮助。
She was going to see through your lie eventually, so I told her that you were lying to protect me.
她最终会看穿你的谎言，所以我告诉她你撒谎来保护我。
I'm getting a bad feeling.
我有不好的预感。
Hunger? Indigestion? I'm sorry, I'm really not very good at this.
饥饿？消化不良？对不起 我真的不擅长这个。
Anyway, Penny now believes that, on friday night, we're going to participate in my cousin Leopold's drug intervention.
不管怎样 Penny现在相信，星期五晚上我们要去参加我表弟Leopold的戒毒交流会。
Your cousin Leopold. Who most people call leo, but he also answers to lee. Remember that. It's important.
你的表弟Leopold？大部分人都叫他Leo，但也有人叫他Lee。记住这点，很重要。
What's important? Details, leonard— the success or failure of our deceitful enterprise turns on details.
什么很重要？详细资料 Leonard 我们的欺诈事业成败与否就在此。
Do you have a cousin Leopold?
你有个叫Leopold的表弟？
No. I made him up. I think you'd call him lee.
不，我编出来的。我想你该叫他Lee。
I don't get it. I already told her a lie. Why replace it with a different lie?
我不明白，我已经跟她说了谎，为什么要用另一个谎来代替呢？
Well, first of all, your lie was laughably transparent, where mine is exquisitely convoluted.
首先，你的谎言很可笑 容易识破，而我的谎言很精确周密。
While you were sleeping, I was weaving an un-unravelable web. Un-unravelable? Yes.
你睡觉的时候我制作了一个天衣无缝的网站。天衣无缝？是的，
If she googles "Leopold Houston", She'll find a facebook page,
如果她用google搜索"Leopold Houston" ，她会搜到一个相册
an online blog depicting his descent into drug use and a desperate yet hopeful listing on eharmony.com.
和网络日志，描述了他沉迷毒药的经过，还能在eharmony.com上找到绝望而又不失希望的好友列表。
Okay, why would i go to a drug intervention for your cousin? Because it's in long beach, and I don't drive.
为什么我要去你表弟的戒毒会？因为在长滩那里，而我不会开车。
We're going to long beach? No, of course not. There's no cousin leo. There's no internet. Focus, leonard. Aw, come on.
我们要去长滩？不，当然不去，没有叫Leo的表弟，没有什么交流会，专心点 Leonard。啊，拜托。
We just leave the house on friday night and we return in the wee hours, emotionally wrung out, from the work of convincing leo to go back into rehab.
我们周五晚出门，凌晨再回来，情绪上来说……已因说服Leo回戒毒所而疲惫不堪。
He goes back into rehab?
他回去戒毒所？
Yes, but, he can relapse if Penny ever invites us to hear her sing again.
是的，但如果Penny又邀请我们听她唱歌，他可以出来旧病复发。
For a noble purpose—to spare me the social embarrassment of having a drug-addled first cousin,
你还是告诉了她我撒了谎。你是为了崇高的理由，保全我的面子——有一个吸毒的表弟，
which I'm assuming is embarrassing, yes?
这照理说应该让我丢脸，是不是？
How am I supposed to member all of this? Oh, that's the best part. You don't have to.
我怎么记得住所有这些？噢 这点是最棒的，你不需要记住，
See, I told Penny that you would be embarrassed if you knew that she found out that you had lied,
我告诉Penny 如果你的谎言被拆穿,你会觉得难为情，
so she's agreed to operate as if the original lie is still in force.
所以她答应当作原来的谎言是真的。
So she's expecting me to lie about going to a symposium in pasadena,
那么她希望我骗她有关研讨会的事，
when, in actuality, we're pretending to go to a drug intervention in long beach. Un-unravelable.
实际上我们要假装去长滩劝人戒毒。天衣无缝。
Oh, hey, Penny. Wow, look at you, all ready for your showcase. You look great. Thanks.
嘿，Penny 打扮好去表演啊，真漂亮。谢谢。
I just wanted to come by and wish you guys luck with your... symposium. Well, thank you.
我过来跟你们祝一声研讨会好运。谢谢你。