How capable of thought are you, first thing in the morning?
一大早刚起床的时候，你想得出什么新点子吗？
Do you go through a routine, rather than try to do something, anything different?
起床后你是按照惯性行动，还是试着做些不同的事？
Does your inner autopilot drive you toward your first coffee before you can achieve anything approaching true consciousness?
你体内的自动驾驶系统会在你真正清醒过来之前，让你先来杯咖啡吗?
I'm a little like that.
我就有点像这样。
I need at least the first few sips of a Starbucks Almond Milk Latte (sad, I know), before I can do anything resembling functioning.
我至少要先喝上几口星巴克杏仁露拿铁(我知道，这很惨)，然后才能做点有用的事情。
I fear I'm not in the minority when I say I have the same sort of coffee every morning.
每天早上都喝同样的咖啡，我想我这样的人为数不少。
Which is why Burger King has come up with an intriguing option for those of a regularist disposition.
这就是为什么汉堡王为那些按部就班的人提供了一个有吸引力的选择。
You see, it's just launched a coffee subscription service.
你看，它刚推出了咖啡订阅服务。
Called the BK Cafe Subscription, the idea is that you download the app and automatically grab the same coffee every day at Burger King.
这款名为“汉堡王咖啡订阅”的应用程序的理念是，你下载它，然后每天可以在汉堡王领一杯一样的咖啡。
It's the price that will move many. Just $5 a month. That's more or less what I pay for a single Grande Almond Milk Latte.
价格会打动很多人。一个月只要5美元。这差不多是我买一杯大杯杏仁露拿铁的钱。
Indeed, in its press release, Burger King specifically targeted Starbucks:
事实上，在它的新闻发布会上，汉堡王专门把星巴克拎出来当靶子。
For the price of a large cappuccino from Starbucks, you can have a BK Café brewed coffee every day for a month.
只要花上星巴克一杯大杯卡布奇诺的价格，整整一个月你都可以每天喝上一杯汉堡王咖啡。
This seemed so counter to sensible belief that I had to delve into the small print.
我的理智告诉我这太没道理了，以至于我不得不深入研究细节。
It is, indeed, the case that you can get a coffee at Burger King every day -- any time of day -- for just the $5 a month.
事实上，只要每月5美元，你就可以每天任何时间在汉堡王喝一杯咖啡。
That means that each coffee will cost you cents, rather than dollars.
这意味着每杯咖啡的价格是几美分，而不是几美元。
But here's what that $5 a month gets you: a small cup of brewed coffee.
但每月5美元能带给你的就是：一小杯煮咖啡

Can anyone survive on just one small cup of coffee? Anyone?
有人能靠一小杯咖啡活下去吗？有谁能吗？
Of course, the real purpose of this underhand generosity is for you to slink up to the drive-thru, see all the pretty pictures of unhealthy food and be tempted.
当然，这种狡诈的慷慨的真正目的是为了让你偷偷溜到汽车餐厅，看到所有不健康食品的诱人图片，然后被诱惑。
After all, you're not yet sentient, are you? You're weak, coffee-less, vulnerable.
毕竟，一大早你还没有什么意志力，对吗？你很虚弱，没有咖啡，很脆弱。
And those fast food places sell such tasty, bad-for-you items that you won't be able to resist.
而那些快餐店卖的东西又好吃又不健康，你根本无法抗拒。
I fear that many, many people will take up this sneaky offer and end up ordering some heinous breakfast sandwich.
我担心很多人会接受这个阴险的提议，最后点了一些罪恶的早餐三明治。
They'll also order two small coffees and feel so very good that one was almost free.
他们还会点两杯小咖啡，还会因为其中一杯几乎是免费的而感觉良好。