Worry.
担心。
As Dushka Zapata says, worry is a useless emotion.
正如萨帕塔所说，担心是无用的情绪。
It does nothing but stress you out, and I hate that, so I hide from it.
它起不了任何作用只能使你感到紧张，我很讨厌担心，所以这是我最想逃避的。
Why hasn’t Mom texted you back by now?
为什么妈妈至今还没回你短信?
A million morbid images spill through my brain. What if she collapsed somewhere? What if she needs my help? What if she’s been attacked by someone?
成千上万张恐怖场景穿过我的脑袋。如果她在某处倒下了怎么办？如果她需要我的帮助怎么办？如果她被某个人袭击了怎么办？
She’s fine, I assure myself.
她很好，我反复告诉自己。
More awful situations fill my head. Then she texts, I’m by the door.
接着，更多糟糕的场景出现在我的脑海里。之后她回我短信：“我在门口。”

I breathe a sigh of relief.
我叹出一口气。
Fear.
恐惧。
Fear of losing the imperative people of my life, who truly matter to me.
害怕失去生命中那些对我很重要的人。
I've already lost some of my dear ones in an abrupt manner. I don't have more mettle to bear losing someone again. Many times, I try to overlook it, but sometimes, my hands become moist if I hear about someone's death.
我已经由于突然的原因失去了一部分最亲的人。我没有办法再忍受失去其他亲人。很多次我试着去忽略它，但是有时当我听到某个亲人的死讯时我的整双手都湿透了。
I don’t really hide from my emotions. I acknowledge that I feel them, but I don’t like feeling them. I know that emotions affect my ability to process information and make a logical decisions, and I don’t like this. I severely crush strong emotions that and hope they don’t come out again.
我从不逃避自己的情绪。我承认我可以感受到我的情绪，但我并不喜欢感受它们。我知道情绪会影响我的处理信息并作出符合逻辑的决定的能力，所以我不喜欢这样。我会强烈地克制自己的情绪，希望它们不会出现。
But if I had to choose an emotion, I guess it’d have to be anger. Anger makes you do the stupidest things that you don’t mean. I try very hard to curb my anger, and I try very hard to hold the furious words in. I try to wait until the feelings pass before talking about what the problem was.
但如果要选一个情绪，我认为应该是愤怒吧。愤怒可以使你做出一些你并不想做的蠢事。我努力地抑制自己的愤怒，努力地克制一些激烈的言辞。我努力地等待情绪消退后再去谈论问题所在。