第一部分

Do You Wish You Had Started a Family Sooner?

Recently I wrote about parental 'do-overs'—what you would do differently with another child. Several readers wrote that one thing they would change is waiting so long to have children.

最近我写了一篇关于“重做父母”的文章，就是如果再要一个孩子，你所做的事情会有什么不同。有几个读者写道，他们想改变的是：别等那么晚才要孩子。

As one commenter wrote: 'The only regret I have is not starting sooner to have kids because I had no idea I'd love being a mom as much as I do and I would have definitely had a third if not a fourth. [My husband] and I were so focused on establishing ourselves career-wise and waited, as it turns out, a little too long.' Another wrote: 'I too wish I had started sooner. Being in my mid-thirties and having my first makes me wish [my husband] and I hadn't dragged our feet so long to start our family. I'm loving being a mommy!'

有个读者是这么写的：“唯一让我感到遗憾的是，我没有早点要孩子，因为当时不知道当自己这么喜爱作母亲的感觉。我肯定会继续生，就算不生四个，至少也要生三个。我和丈夫那时候太重视事业，结果等了很长时间才决定要孩子。”还有一个写道：“我也希望能早点要孩子，我生第一个孩子的时候已经三十多岁了，我和丈夫都觉得当初不该犹豫那么久才做出决定，我太爱当妈妈的感觉了！”

These comments hit close to home. Like a number of readers, my husband and I waited a while before we chose to have kids in our mid-30s. Now that I have my first son I love being a mom so much that I occasionally regret not starting my family a little sooner. I'd like to have three kids (I grew up in a family of three children and loved it) but because I got a 'later' start, that might not be so feasible as my body gets older and my fertility and energy-level wane.

对此我深有同感。和许多读者一样，我和丈夫等到三十多岁才决定要孩子。生下第一个小男孩后，我觉得当妈妈的感觉好极了，所以有时候会后悔没有早点生孩子。我想要三个孩子（我父母就生了三个，我很喜欢在那样的环境里长大），但由于我起步晚了，生三个可能不太现实，因为身体会变老，生育能力和精力会跟不上。

On the plus side, my husband and I who will be married five years this week but who have been together for eight years waited until we were sure that we really wanted and were ready to have children; we were rather indifferent about having children early on in our relationship, so we wanted to make sure that we really wanted to be parents. My husband is a child of divorce, so we also wanted to be confident that our marriage was on sound footing before we brought a child into the world. We also wanted to be reasonably settled financially and professionally.

不过，晚要孩子也有好处，本周将迎来我和丈夫的结婚五周年纪念日，但我俩在一起已经八年了。我们等了很长时间，充份确认是否真的要孩子，并做好了各种准备。早些时候，我们觉得要不要孩子无所谓，因此需要时间确认自己真的想当父母。我丈夫来自一个单亲家庭，所以我们想在赋予一个孩子生命前，想确信我们的婚姻基础很牢固。此外，我们也想先在经济上和事业上站稳脚跟。

第二部分

What's more, being older parents and having a bunch of nephews and a niece, as well as a ton of friends who already had young children, meant that we had a lot of models for parenthood and we didn't feel overwhelmed or particularly anxious about being parents once our son was born. And as a couple who loves to travel, we were able to take some incredible trips—to South Africa, Turkey, Costa Rica, Italy, Mexico—that would be more challenging and expensive once kids were here.

还有一个好处是，作为一对晚育父母，我们周围已经有一大堆亲戚朋友生了孩子，可以向他们学习很多知识，不至于在自己为人父母时感到手足无措或者焦虑不安。作为一对喜欢到处玩的夫妻，我们有时间去一些很棒的地方旅行，比如南非、土耳其、哥斯达黎加、意大利、墨西哥等；而如果有孩子，出去旅行将显得既困难，又花钱。

But being older parents has its drawbacks, too. While I had no trouble getting pregnant with my son, I'm well aware that fertility drops precipitously for many women as they hit their late 30s and 40s. It's not just an issue for women; as the Juggle and the the New York Times have reported, dads have biological clocks, too. French researchers reported last year that the chance of a couple's conceiving begins to fall when the man is older than 35 and falls sharply if he is older than 40, according to the Times.

然而，晚生孩子也有缺点。虽然怀第一个孩子没问题，但我很清楚，很多女人的生育能力到三四十岁时会突然下降。而且，并非只有女人才这样。本专栏和《纽约时报》(New York Times)都报导过，男人也有类似的生物钟。《时代杂志》(Times) 2008年的一篇报导说，法国研究人员发现，男人过35岁后，夫妻之间的怀孕成功率开始下降，到40岁后，成功率会急剧降低。

At the Juggle, we've written before about how women, on average, are now opting to have babies younger; the average age at which women give birth for the first time, 25 years old, posted the first decline since the government began tracking the data in 1968, according to the National Center for Health Statistics. Readers, did any of you wait a while to have children or did you start your families when young? How do you feel about your decision?

在此前的专栏文章中，我们曾经报导过，现在大多数女性都希望早点要孩子。根据美国国家卫生统计中心(National Center for Health Statistics)的数据，女性生头胎时的平均年龄为25岁，这是政府自1968年跟踪这方面数据以来第一次出现年龄下降。各位读者朋友，你是结婚后等一段时间再要孩子，还是趁着年轻就让二人世界更进一步？你对自己做出的决定有何感想？