Do women cheat as much as men do?

by Erin Flaherty, Shine staf

That's the first question the latest infidelity studies point to. The second is: If you cheated on your spouse, would you even admit it to a researcher?

Historically, the male sex gets most of the flak when it comes to infidelity among spouses. But that could be due to those tired old gender roles we're cast in. A recent New York Times report implies that women may simply be more likely to lie about it for that very reason. Research professor of anthropology at Rutgers Helen E. Fisher suggests that, “Men want to think women don’t cheat, and women want men to think they don’t cheat, and therefore the sexes have been playing a little psychological game with each other.” Fun!

“Is it that men are bragging about it and women are lying to everybody including themselves?” she asks. Makes sense. After all, it's no secret that the widely held double standard that men who cheat are "studs" while women are "sluts" is still disturbingly prevalent.

Still, the changes in the landscape of cheating have surprised researchers who have found that infidelity is on the rise and "women appear to be closing the adultery gap: younger women appear to be cheating on their spouses nearly as often as men."

That's not to say that the guys are entirely off the hook. Medical advances like Viagra and erectile dysfunction remedies ensure that those with XY chromosomes can cheat longer and um, stronger. But when it comes to the younger set, women may be finding more opportunities to cheat via interoffice affairs and the good 'ole World Wide Web. While men might be content to "stray" by looking at porn--a relatively benign form of infidelity in the grand scheme of things--Atlanta psychiatrist Dr. Frank Pittman notes that he's observed more women acknowledging sexual affairs that began with electronic contact born out of the desire to emotionally connect with someone on a more intimate (and therefore stereotypically "feminine") level.

So yes, it would appear that women certainly cheat more than they're usually given credit for. (Of course, who wants to take credit for something as damaging as an extramarital affair?) But when it comes to our original second question pertaining to the idea that the fairer sex is more likely to lie about it due to societal double standards, one wonders if the modern woman has just become more open about her transgressions than in the past?

In the absence of hard and fast numbers--as opposed to all this admittedly speculative research--when it comes to adultery, here's the real question for the ladies out there: Have you ever cheated and well, kept mum about the damn thing? (As opposed to say, bragging about your conquests in the locker room or whatever?)

这是最新背信研究所指向的第一个问题：是否女人和男人一样爱说谎？第二个问题是：如果你对你的配偶不忠，你是否会向研究员承认。

从以前的观点来看，当提到配偶之间背叛的事男性都会大大的吹嘘一番。这种背叛或许是因为厌倦了古老的性别角色。最近《纽约时报》报道暗示女人在配偶背叛问题上更趋向于说谎。罗格斯大学的人类学研究教授海伦-费希尔建议说：&ldo?quo;男人都想着女人不会说谎，女人也希望男人如此认为，因此男女之间开始在相互之间玩一些心理游戏。”非常有趣！

她问：&ldo?quo;是否男人爱在这事上吹牛而女人却对任何人都说谎甚至是自己。”有意思。毕竟，这没有任何秘密，有两种标准在评判男女背叛的事，当男人背叛的时候就比较“缄默” 而女性“放荡”却邻人不安的广为传扬。

在背叛上的变化令研究人员很吃惊，他们发现背叛呈现上升的趋势，同时女性似乎在缩小这种差距：年轻的女性背叛配偶的频率和男人是一样的。

这并不是说男人都摆脱了这种背叛的困境。医学方面的进步像“伟哥”等药物能让XY染色体的男性背叛的更为长久和强烈。但是到比较年轻的一代，女性更容易找到背叛的机会，比如说在办公室之间，还有网络。同时男性过于沉迷色情文学--在这一大类事上算一种相对良好的行为--亚特兰大精神病医生弗兰克-皮特曼指出他发现大多女性起初知道性事是通过网络的接触，继而希望与某人在感情接触上发展到更加亲密的程度。

是的，显然女性的背叛行为比他们承认的多。（当然，谁都不想分享这种只会带来损害的事）但是当我们回到最初的第二个问题，女性更趋向于说谎是因为社会的双重标准，有人就想是否现代女性对于自己的背叛会更加的开放？

由于缺少严格的数据--作为反对这些无可否认的投机的研究---当遭遇到通奸行为的时候，各位女士的问题就出现了：你是否有背叛行为，是否对这该死的事保持沉默。（把这些都隐藏起来，藏在一个上锁的房子或者其他地方）