2014年11月1日雅思写作解析及语料库(新东方版)
日期:2014-11-04 17:53

(单词翻译:单击)

  2014年11月1日雅思写作解析及语料库
  Some people think that it is better for people to be unemployed than people to be employed but they do not enjoy,to what extent do you agree or disagree?有人认为,做一份不喜欢的工作不如暂时待业,是否同意这个观点。
  雅思写作核心类型:
  1. 是否同意观点
  2. 讨论两种观点
  3. 分析问题解决问题或者分析影响解决问题
  4. 利弊讨论或者先原因分析再利弊讨论
  评分标准 = 高分指南
  1. Task Achievement / Response.
  2. Coherence and cohesion
  3. Lexical Resource
  4. Grammatical Range and Accuracy
  我押题的题目:大学生择业难的影响和解决策略
  失业的影响 = 失业对于年轻人的弊端
  1. 经济没有保障,心中没有自信,幸福指数下降;家人的担忧;社会的不稳定因素。
  2. 个体性成长经验:孤独,自卑,社交方面力不从心。相反,有工作,良好的人脉关系是幸福的一种源泉。
  相反的逻辑:有工作,哪怕是不感兴趣的工作的利好:
  1. 经济没有保障,心中有自信,经济和精神上独立,幸福指数提高;父母不必担忧。
  2. 有工作,有良好的人脉关系,朋友是幸福幸福的一种源泉。例子展开,以我为例,我的梦想是旅行美食家,但是,我20岁,我是兼职教师,教师是安身立命的方式,不是职业追求,但是,我爱上了这份工作,我有职业成就感,友谊的增加。结论,兴趣是可以培养的。
  点评:
  关于是否同意一种观点的提问是雅思,托福共有的驳论文写法。
  驳论文写作思路:三分让步,七分反驳。
  作家立场:做一份不太喜欢的工作比待业失业值得推荐。
  原创范文:
  首段:背景介绍 + 争议焦点 + 作家立场:
  The proportion of one’s life allocating to work is very high,therefore,acceptance about one's career must reflect how an individual feels about his or her life, in this sense, job contentment is indeed crucial for people’s happiness. One of the characteristics of modern work is that people enjoy more freedom in their career options. A heated debate is that a jobless situation is superior to embarking on a job that one takes less interest in. Personally speaking, provided that the work is not that boring or unacceptable, even the dullest job, is to most people, less painful than idleness.
  解析:
  Provided that the work is not excessive in amount, even the dullest job, is to most people, less painful than idleness. 假如工作不是特别令人厌倦的或者不可接受的话,即使是最枯燥的工作也比无所事事要强。
  二段: 反驳段:论据和例证展开证明作家立场
  For a start, working, even though we take less interest in, by occupying time so constructively, makes one contented and with no time for boredom. Besides, many benefits ensue, securing a job enables one to be independent both economically and spiritually. To be the bread-winner of the family not only brings about personal sense of security but also effectively harmonize family relationship because a stable job is, to many parents, a kind of spiritual consolation. Plus, one has better personal resources to draw on by taking up a job, a well-connected interpersonal relationship is definitely an indispensable source of well-being. My personal story could justify my stand, I, originally, have no alternative but to work as a freelance English teacher though my dream career is a professional self-traveler, however, the sense of career fulfillment gradually grew on me when my painstaking efforts helped many ambitious young adults realize their dreams. Most importantly, my circle of friends has been greatly enlarged.
  解析:
  1. Working,by occupying time so constructively, makes one contented and with no time for boredom. 因为工作填满了时间的空隙,使人心满意足,再也没有无聊之感。
  2. One has better personal resources to draw on by taking up a job 工作使人拥有良好的人脉资源。
  3. A well-connected interpersonal relationship is definitely an indispensable source of well-being. 良好的人际关系是幸福不可缺少的源泉。
  三段:让步段:让步原题观点的合理性 + 加以反驳
  To be sure, I have to concede that it is a success if one can combine personal interest with career choice. After all, interest is the best simulation of work. It is conceivable that our infinite potential could be tapped and our devotion of work could be strengthened if we can zero in on what our hearts desire. By contrast, we might feel a little bit bored and gloomy when we undertake a job only for the purpose earning a decent living. That is why a number of people prefer to be out-of-work rather than reluctantly choose one job that agonizes them. What I want to refute, however, is that a man with great wisdom should, first of all, land a job, then, opt for dream work, and finally carve out his own career if possible.
  解析:
  1. land a job 找到工作
  2. zero in on专注于……
  3. A number of people prefer to be out-of-work rather than reluctantly choose one job that agonizes them.很多人宁可自己待业也不喜欢违背意愿做自己不喜欢的工作。
  4. What I want to refute, however, is that a man with great wisdom should, first of all, land a job, then, opt for dream work, and finally carve out his own career if possible. 我想反驳的是,对于智者而言,先就业,后择业,如有可能自我创业才是人生的成功。
  尾段:再次亮明观点
  Overall, my stand is that it is up to us to find the ways and means to ideal career each of us seek and long for. However, a stable job is to a college leaver or unemployed youngster what water is to fish.
  解析:
  It is up to us to find the ways and means to find ideal career each of us seek and long for我们要自己找到追求渴望的理想的事业。
  A stable job is to a college leaver or unemployed youngster what water is to fish. 一份稳定的工作对于大学毕业的新鲜人或者失业的年轻人就如同水对于鱼。
  全文点评:
  原创范文依然保持创作的高质量以及作家文笔:主题明确,细节展开,忠实情感,淡化模板,自由写作,首尾呼应。可为考生赏析学习之佳作。文无定法,原创语料库以及范文只是雅思写作范文之一种,希望可以抛砖引玉,建议学生背诵范文中精彩词汇句法,感谢考生一直以来对于雅思频道以及原创范文的关注。

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重点单词
  • simulationn. 模拟,仿真,赝品
  • refutevt. 驳斥,反驳,证明
  • effectivelyadv. 事实上,有效地
  • characteristicsn. 特性,特征;特质;特色(characteristi
  • sourcen. 发源地,来源,原始资料
  • proportionn. 比例,均衡,部份,(复)体积,规模 vt. 使成比
  • devotionn. 虔诚,祈祷,献身,奉献,热爱
  • concedevt. 承认,给予 vi. 让步
  • responsen. 回答,响应,反应,答复 n. [宗]答复语,
  • extentn. 广度,宽度,长度,大小,范围,范围,程度 n. [