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Want to sound and feel more confident? Ditch these 11 phrases from your vocabulary, say psychologists

We all have that little voice in our heads that weighs in on everything we do or say. If we let it, it can make us feel demoralized, belittled or just less capable. The end result is that we wind up not accomplishing what we want.

It’s never easy navigating challenging times, but we’ve found ways to reframe our thoughts and change our attitude.

Here are 11 negative phrases to ditch if you want to think more positively and feel more confident, according to behavioral scientists, researchers and psychologists.

1. “I have to do that.”

What to say instead: “I get to do that.”

Swapping that one little word will change your attitude in a big way. It makes you look at something as an opportunity, rather than an obligation. Even if the task is unpleasant, it can teach you new lessons and open new doors.

2. “I can’t do that.”

What to say instead: “I can try to do that.”

Don’t admit defeat before you’ve begun! When you tell yourself that you can try, you’re not only giving yourself a chance to accomplish something, you’re also not setting up excessively high expectations, which makes it easier to actually succeed.

3. “I should do that.”

What to say instead: “I will do that.” (Or “won’t do,” depending on your mindset).

“Should” is a controlling word, and it puts pressure on us. So put yourself back in charge. Drop the “should” and make yourself the decision-maker by choosing whether or not do something on your own terms.

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