(单词翻译:单击)
I don't really like tips; tips about communicating well, tips about writing.
我不太喜欢技巧；交流的技巧，写作的技巧
What I would prefer is a process that transforms you so the tips take place automatically.
我更喜欢的是一种表达的过程，技巧会自动出现
I mean for instance, very often a tip is given: “When you're speaking to a crowd, vary the pace of your speech, vary the volume.”
比如说，经常会有人告诉你一个技巧：“当你在人群面前讲话时，调整语速，改变音量”
Well, those are two good things, but if they happen mechanically it gets to be kind of boring.
这两点是好事，但如果它们只是机械性的发生，就会显得很无聊了
Some people are encouraged when they're coached: “At this point leave where you're standing and walk over there and take a pause.”
有些人在接受指导时会受到这样的鼓励：“说到这儿的时候，去走动一下，稍微暂停一会儿”
Well, maybe that makes sense in terms of how it's written; at the end of that paragraph you want to make a space before the next paragraph,
或许这在写作中是说得通的；在一段的结尾你想留些空间，再开始写下一段
but it doesn't necessarily make sense in terms of how you're talking and relating to the people you're talking with.
但是这一点在你的说话方式以及与说话对象产生联系上就不一定有道理了
That—relating to them—should be the source of a pause, the source of moving,
与他们产生联系才是你停顿和走动的原因
because it comes out of the thought process I'm going through and it comes out of the thought process I sense you're going through.
因为这是个思维过程，我在理解你所说的话，而我也察觉到你想要弄懂
Have you understood that last part? So now I'm thinking, if you have what's the next thing that I can tack onto that that will mean something to you?
你听懂上一部分的内容了吗？我在想，如果你懂了，那我要再说点什么东西才对你有价值呢？
And if you haven't, should I clarify it a little more?
如果你没懂，那我是不是要再详细解释一下呢？
So there's a dynamic relationship between us that leads to a change in pace, to a change in volume and that kind of thing.
所以我们之间有一种动态关系，是它会导致节奏变化、音量变化等等
A tip is just an intellectualization of that,
技巧只是把这种动态关系给理智化了
which might be okay to give somebody once they've got the grounding in the ability to connect, but it ought to come out of the connection.
如果某人有了沟通的基础能力，那还可以直接告诉他这种技巧，但它的来源应该是关系
It shouldn't be a checkbox that you tick off. So I really don’t like tips.
它不应该是一种你用来列举的选项框。所以我真的不喜欢技巧一说
If I'm pressed really hard there are three tips that I do kind of follow.
如果非要逼我的话，那大概有三个技巧我会遵守
Probably it's a good idea to follow these tips after you get used to being connected to somebody,
或许当你习惯与某人产生联系时，遵照这些技巧是件好事
but there are three things that I like to do, I call it the three rules of three.
不过有三件我喜欢做的事，我称之为“关于3的3条规则”
So the first rule is, I try only to say three important things when I talk to people.
第一条规则是，我跟人说话的时候会尽量只说3件重要的事
No more than three. If it's one thing that's maybe even better, but usually there's a lot to say.
不会超过3件。如果只有一件事那就更好了，不过通常会有很多事需要说
When I make notes on what I want to talk about,
当我做笔记我要说什么的时候
if I see I'm going on past three to four and five I start eliminating them or seeing if I can fold them into the other things.
如果我看到自己超过3件说到了4和5，那我就会开始删减，或者看看能不能把它们压缩到其他事情里
Because three things are really all I can remember and I don't work from notes when I talk to people and I advise other people not to.
因为我就只能记住3件事，我跟人说话的时候不会看笔记，我也不建议别人看
I never read it because reading just excommunicates you; it's not communication it's excommunication, in my view.
我从来不读笔记，因为那会让你脱离对话，在我看来，那不是交流，那是脱离交流
So I can't remember more than three things, and I don't think they can remember more than three things,
我只能记住3件事，我觉得别人也只能记住3件
so what's the point of telling them stuff they're not going to remember? So I stick to three.
那告诉他们他们记不住的东西有什么意义呢？所以我只说3个
That's rule number one of the rule of three things.
那是三条规则中的第一条
The second rule is, if I have a difficult thing to understand, if there's something I think is not going to be that easy to get,
第二条是，如果我有一个很难理解的东西，如果我觉得某件事不太好懂
I try to say it in three different ways because I think if you come in from different angles
我会试着以三种不同的方式来说，因为如果你从不同的角度来解释
you have a better chance of getting a three-dimensional view of this difficult idea, so I try to say it three different ways.
你就更可能对这个难懂的观点有个立体的理解，所以我会试着用三种方式来说
And the third tip, which I always forget, is that if I have a difficult thing that's hard to get,
第三个技巧，我老是忘记，那就是如果有一件事很难理解
I try to say it three times through the talk, so that the first time you hear it you start to get used to it,
我会在整个谈话过程中三遍提到它，这样你第一次听到的时候会习惯它
the second time it's familiar and the third time you say, “Oh yeah, right. Okay.”
第二次会觉得有点熟悉，第三次就会觉得“哦，对，明白了”
Now, I do follow those three tips, but I don't think I tell somebody: “You're going to get up to talk, here are three tips to remember.”
现在，我确实会遵从这三个技巧，但我不会告诉别人：“你要讲话了，这有三个技巧需要记住”
It's a process. You've got to get transformed into being a better communicator.
这是个过程。你必须得慢慢转化成一个更好的沟通者
You've got to go through steps where it's like going to the gym,
你必须得经历一些步骤，就像去健身房一样
only it's a lot more fun than going to the gym because it involves connecting with another person and we're built to connect with another person.
只是这比去健身房有趣多了，因为这涉及到与他人沟通，我们生来就是要与人沟通的
In spite of the fact that we often avoid it, it actually is fun when we get into that position.
虽然我们经常逃避它，但当我们真正做起来的时候会很有趣
So if we could get ourselves transformed into liking connecting with the audience we're talking to or writing for,
所以如果我们能让自己喜欢上和谈话对象或写作对象产生联系
then these tips will happen automatically or finally we'll be able to put them to work in terms of that transformed way we have of connecting.
那么这些技巧自然而然就会发生，最终能让它们以很自然的方式产生效果
It really feels good.
那种感觉很好
