All right, what are we having?
好吧，你们吃什么呢？
I don't believe in these crazy diets you know, just everything in moderation.
我不相信那些疯狂的节食法。只要正常饮食就行了。
Your muffins.
你的松饼来了。
I'll take those to go. For the kids.
我要外带。给孩子们吃。
Oh, I know what I wanted to ask you. You were on the show years ago and then they killed you off. What happened there?
我知道我想问什么了。多年前，编剧安排你在剧中意外身亡。那是怎么回事？
Oh, it was so stupid, I said some stuff in an interview that I really shouldn't've said.
说起来很傻，我在一次访问中说了不该说的话。
But believe me, that's not gonna happen today. Understood.
但今天我不会那么做。 了解。
So, what'd you say back then? I said that I...
所以，你那时说了什么？ 我说我……
You guys, this is Shelley, she's interviewing me for Soap Opera Digest, uh Shelley, these are my friends...
她是雪丽。她在代表《肥皂剧文摘》访问我。雪丽，他们是我的朋友。
Hi, I'm gal pal Rachel Green. And if you want the dirt, I'm the one you come too.
嗨，我是女性朋友瑞秋·格林。你想知道八卦消息就来找我。
This might be Joey's baby, who knows? I'm just kidding. Seriously, gal pal Rachel Green.
这可能是乔伊的孩子，谁知道呢？我只是在开玩笑，我是女性朋友瑞秋·格林。
Who just lost the respect of her unborn child.
她刚刚丢够了她还没有出世的孩子的脸。
I'm gonna go get this warmed up.
我去把这个热一下。
Joey, you're doing great.
乔伊，你表现得很好。
So far, nothing stupid.
到目前为止没有说傻话。
Mento? No, thanks.
曼陀珠？ 不用，谢谢。
So as Joey's friends, is there anything that you guys think our readers should know?
身为乔伊的朋友，你们有什么事想跟读者分享吗？
Uh no, no just just that he is a great guy.
没有，他是个大好人。
Yeah, that's gonna get you into Soap Opera Digest.
说这种话你也想上《肥皂剧文摘》。
Well I......I would just like to say that Joey truly has enriched the days of our lives.
我……我想说，乔伊真的丰富了我们的生活。
Umm, I...I just think that you don't expect someone so hot to be so sweet.
谁也想不到这么性感的男人还会那么体贴。
I like that. What's your name? Phoebe Buffay.
这句我喜欢。你叫什么名字？ 菲比·布非。
How do you spell that? So we can get it right.
怎么拼？我们要保证拼写正确。
Okay, it's P as in Phoebe. H as in Heebie. O as in Obie. E as in Ebie. B as in Beebee. And E as in, "'ello there, mate!"
菲比的P，希比的H，欧比的O，艾比的E，比的B。E是"哈喽，朋友！"
Great! Well, it was nice meeting all of you.
太棒了，很高兴能认识你们。
Yeah, you too. Thanks.
对，我也是。 谢谢。
So it seems like you have a lot of friends, who would you say is your best friend?
你似乎有很多朋友。谁是你最好的朋友？
How come you have two?
你为什么会有两个？
Well, this one's for you.
这个是送你的。
Get out! No, I can't.
少来了！ 不，我做不到。
No, no. Listen, I, I know how much this means to you and I also know that this is about more than just jewelry. It's about you and me and the fact that we're best buds.
我知道这对你来说意义重大，这不只是首饰而己。它代表了你跟我是最好的朋友。
Is this friendship? I think so! Check it out! We're bracelet buddies!
这是友谊吗？我想是的。你看，我们是手镯兄弟！
That's what they'll call us!
他们以后就会这么称呼我们！
Oh, Joey! Sorry! It's all right. Don't worry about it.
乔伊，对不起。 没关系，别担心。
No, but look, that's gonna leave a stain.
可是你看啊，会留下印子。
Rach, hey, it's fine. You're at Joey's.
瑞秋，没关系，你在乔伊家。
Really? Yeah, look.
真的吗？ 对，你看。
I've never lived like this before. I know!
我从没过过这种生活。 我知道。
Well, don't waste it. I mean, it's still food. Jeez!
别浪费，这毕竟还是食物，天啊！
I've been feeling incredibly guilty about this, because I wanna be a good friend and damn it, I am a good friend. So just shut up and close your eyes.
我对这件事有深深的罪恶感，我想当个好朋友，我本来就是个好朋友。闭上你的嘴巴跟眼睛。
Wow, you are a good friend, 'cause the audition was this morning, and I didn't get it. But that was a hell of a kiss. Rachel is a very lucky girl.
你确实是个好朋友。我今天早上去试镜，但我失败了。但那个吻真的很棒，瑞秋真是个幸运的姑娘。
Let's get the contestants out of their isolation booths. And they're off!
请参赛者离开隔离间。出发！
Get your foot off my contestant! Judge!
别挡住我的选手，裁判！
Judge rules: No violation. Ohhh.
裁判判决，没有犯规。 哦。
And the duck gets the Nutter Butter!
鸭子找到花生酱饼干了！
No! Aw. Hey! That's not a Nutter Butter, that's just an old Wonton!
不，那不是花生酱饼干，那是以前掉的馄饨！
No, judge rules, Nutter Butter.
不，裁判判决是花生酱饼干。
Tough call. Yeah.
黑哨。 是的。
I'd seen this thing on The Discovery Channel.
我在探索频道看到过。
Wait a minute. I saw that! On The Discovery Channel. Yeah, about jellyfish, and how if you...You peed on yourself?
等一下，我看过那期节目！在探索频道上。关于水母，如果你……你往自己身上尿尿了？
You can't say that! You you don't know! I mean I thought I was gonna pass out from the pain! Anyway I I tried, I but I I couldn't...bend that way. So...
别那么说，你不了解那有多痛。我以为我会痛得昏过去。总之我试过了，但我没办法那样子弯曲身子。所以……
Ewwww! That's right, I stepped up!
哦！ 没错，我挺身而出了！
She's my friend and she needed help! If I had to, I'd pee on any one of you!
她是我的朋友，她需要帮忙。有必要的话，我可以往你们任何人身上尿尿。
Umm, no. No best friend, no. Just a lot of close friends. Yeah.
不，我没有最好的朋友。我只有很多密友。
So umm, now back to the show. How does it feel to have a huge gay fan base?
现在回到那部剧。有那么多男同志支持你，你有什么感觉？
Really? Me? Wow, I don't even know any huge gay people.
真的吗？我？我都不认识任何男同志。
It hurts me. It physically hurts me.
我真的觉得心好痛。
Now, off the record, you're not...
这是我们的私下谈话，你不是……
What? Are you referring to my man's bag?
怎么？你是在说我的男士背包吗？
At first, I thought it just looked good, but it's practical, too.
刚开始我只觉得它好看，但它还很实用。
Check it out. It's got compartments for all your stuff: Your wallet, your keys, your address book.
快看啊，里面有很多放东西的小袋子。你可以放皮夹、钥匙、通讯簿。
Your makeup.
化妆品。
Now now now should I climb down your front so we're face to face or or should I climb down your back so we're we're butt to face.
我是要从你的正面滑下去，让我们面对面，还是从你的背面滑下去，屁股对着脸？
I think face to face. Face to face, yeah. I would say that.
我想面对面比较好。 对，面对面。
Okay, here I come. All right.
好吧，我来了。 好吧。
Oh, my...How much do you weigh, Ross?
天啊……你有多重，罗斯？
I prefer not to answer that right now. I'm still carrying a little holiday weight.
我现在不想回答那个问题。假日结束后，我胖了不少。
You know, when we talked about face to face, I don't think we thought it all the way through.
我们说"面对面"的时候，没有完全想清楚！
Hey, Pheebs. Hey!
嗨，菲比。 嗨。
Check it out.
你看。
How much of a man am I?
我很有男子气概吧？
Wow! Nice! Manly and also kind of a slut.
不错嘛，男子气概中透着淫荡。
You're turning into a woman.
你变成女人了。
No, I'm not! Why would you say that? That's just mean!
才没有！你为什么会那么说？那太伤人了！
Now I've upset you? What did I say?
我惹毛你了吗？我说了什么？
Not what you said, it's just the way you said it. Oh, my God! I'm a woman!
不是你说的话，而是你的语气。天啊！我是个女人！
Great nap. It really was.
我睡得很香。 没错。
Me? Gay? No. No. No. But I have a number of close friends who are.
我？男同志？不不不。但我有很多密友是男同志。
So let's talk about women. I'm sure our female readers will be interested to know about your romantic life.
我们来谈谈女人。我相信女性读者对你的爱情生活很有兴趣。
Oh oh oh oh, how I do it is, I look a woman up and down and then I say, "Hey, how you doing?"
我会对着一个女人上下打量，对她说，"嘿，你好吗？"
Oh, please.
拜托。
Hey. How you doing?
嘿，你好吗？
Hey. How you doing?
嘿，你好吗？
He has the most amazing Porsche under there.
他有一辆很棒的保时捷。
I'd love to show you, but I just tucked her in. She's sleeping. Hey uh, would you two girls like to go for a drink?
我很乐意让你们参观，但我才刚把它停好。它在休息。你们两个想去喝一杯吗？
Is Rachel here? I'm her sister. Oh, my God! Jill!
瑞秋在吗？我是她妹妹。 天啊，吉尔！
Oh, my God! Rachel!
天啊，瑞秋！
Oh, my God! Introduce us! Well, this is Chandler.
天啊，快帮我们介绍！ 他是钱德勒。
And you know Monica and Ross! And that's Phoebe, and that's Joey.
你认识莫妮卡跟罗斯。她是菲比，他是乔伊。
Hey, how you doing? Don't!
嘿，你好吗？ 少来！
You're a really nice guy and I'm happy to be your roommate and your friend. I'm just...You know, I just don't feel that way about you.
你是个好人。我很愿意当你的室友跟朋友。我只是……对你没有那种感觉。
I see what happened. It's because I was trying to repel you. Right? Believe me, you'd feel a lot different if I turned it on.
我知道是怎么回事了。那是因为我试着抗拒你，对吧？相信我，我发动攻势后你会有截然不同的感觉。
I don't think so. Oh, I do.
我觉得不会。 绝对会。
How you doing?
你好吗？
I'm okay.
我很好。
What? Oh, dear God!
什么？天啊！
Not much to tell there. I'm really shy.
没什么好说的，我真的很害羞。
So that's it. I guess that's all I need. Thank you so much. I think they will be running this in the beginning of next month.
好了，我想我已经问完了。非常感谢。我想应该下一期就会刊出你的访问。
Oh, great. Great. Thank you.
太棒了。谢谢你。
Bye. Bye bye.
再见。 拜拜。
I did it. Amazing.
我办到了。 太棒了。
Oh wait! I almost forgot. We have to ask everybody this. Other, than Days of Our Lives, what's your favorite soap opera?
等一下，我差点忘了。我们对每个人都要提这个问题。除了《我们的日子》以外你最喜欢哪出肥皂剧？
Oh, I don't watch soap operas. Excuse me? I have a life, you know?
我不看肥皂剧，抱歉。我的生活没那么无聊。
Thank you. The readers at Soap Opera Digest will be happy to learn that.
谢谢。《肥皂剧文摘》的读者知道那点一定会很高兴。
Oh, good enough. So close!
非常好。只差一点而己。
Wow! I can't believe they didn't put in the part where you said you didn't watch soap operas.
他们竟然没登出你说你不看肥皂剧那一段。
Yeah, I called the lady about that. I told her I was just joking. She was pretty nice about that.
我打电话告诉那个女记者，我是在开玩笑。她接受了。
You slept with her, didn't you? A little bit.
你跟她上床了，对吧？ 可以那么说。
Wow! This picture of you sure is steamy.
你的这张照片英气逼人啊。
Oh yeah, that's just a little something for my huge gay fan base.
那是为了配合我男同志影迷的喜好。
Did you just wink at me?
你在对我抛媚眼吗？
Hey, you're the one who loves the picture.
是你说喜欢那张照片的。