The girl she had brought into the world and for fifteen years had been smiling.
这个由她带进这个世界的女孩，这个曾笑了十五年的女孩。
One day my father asked her, 'Pekai, tell me truthfully. What do you think – is it my fault?'
一天，我的父亲问母亲：“托·贝凯，你老实跟我说，发生了这种事情，你怎么想——是我的错吗？”
No, Khaista,' she replied. 'You didn't send Malala out thieving or killing or to commit crimes. It was a noble cause.'
“不，卡什塔，”母亲回答，“你没有要马拉拉去外面行窃、残杀或犯罪。她从事的是一项高尚的事业。”
Even so, my father worried that in future every time I smiled it would be a reminder of the shooting.
即便如此，父亲依旧担心，在未来，我的每一个微笑都将提醒我们枪击案的存在。
That was not the only way they found me changed.
这不是唯一一件他们觉得我“变了”的事情。
Back in Swat I used to be a very fragile and sensitive child who would cry at the slightest thing, but in hospital in Birmingham even when I was in terrible pain I did not complain.
过去，在斯瓦特，我是个非常脆弱而敏感的孩子，哪怕是最细微的事情都能惹得我一阵哭泣。但在伯明翰的医院里，经历再极端的痛苦，我都不会抱怨一句。
The hospital refused to allow other visitors even though they were inundated by requests, as they wanted me to be able to concentrate on my rehabilitation in private.
院方拒绝了其他访客的探望，纵使探视请求如洪水般袭来。医院希望我能在不被干扰的情况下，集中精力尽快康复。
Four days after my parents arrived a group of politicians came to the hospital from the three countries that had helped me – Rehman Malik, Pakistan's interior minister, William Hague, the British foreign minister and Sheikh Abdullah bin Zayed, foreign minister of the UAE.
父母抵达医院四天之后，三位曾联手帮助过我的政治家来到医院——巴基斯坦内政部长拉赫曼·马利克，英国外交部长威廉·黑格，以及阿拉伯联合酋长国外交部部长谢卡·阿卜杜拉·本·扎耶德。
They were not allowed to see me but were briefed by doctors and met my father.
院方拒绝了他们探望的请求，改由医生向他们简单报告我的现况，同时与我的父亲会面。
He was upset by the ministers' visit because Rehman Malik said to him, 'Tell Malala she should give a smile to the nation.'
部长们的来访让父亲心情沉重，因为拉赫曼·马利克对他说：“告诉马拉拉，她应该对全国人民微笑致意。”
He did not know that that was the one thing I could not do.
部长并不知道，在所有事情里面，那是我唯一做不到的。
Rehman Malik had revealed that my attacker was a talib called Ataullah Khan who he said had been arrested in 2009 during the military operation in Swat but freed after three months.
拉赫曼·马利克告诉我们，袭击我的男人是一名叫阿陶拉·汗的塔利班，他曾在2009年军方的军事行动中被捕，三个月后被释放。
There were media reports that he had done a physics degree at Jehanzeb College.
据媒体报道，阿陶拉拥有杰哈兹布大学物理学学位。
Malik claimed the plan to shoot me was hatched in Afghanistan.
马利克说，狙杀我的计划是在阿富汗被策划出来的。
He said he had put a $1 million bounty on the head of Ataullah and promised they would find him.
他说他悬赏100万元给任何能带来阿陶拉头颅的人，并承诺一定会找到他。
We doubted that, as no one has ever been caught – not the killer of Benazir Bhutto, not whoever was behind the plane crash that killed General Zia, not the assassin of our first prime minister, Liaquat Ali Khan.
我们对此表示怀疑。到目前为止，没有任何人被逮捕——无论是杀了贝·布托的人，暗中密谋以飞机失事的手段杀死齐亚·哈克将军的人，或是杀死我们第一届总理利亚格特·阿里·汗的人，他们都还逍遥法外。