Look at poor Jacob. I feel awful.
雅各布好可怜，我好内疚。
It was just panic attack coupled with his first orgasm. Paramedics said he'll be fine.
人生首次"高潮"后的恐慌发作而已嘛。医护人员说他会没事的。
I think that's what they said. It was hard to hear over all their laughing.
应该是这样吧。他们边笑边说，听不太清楚。
More emojis from Andy. Christmas tree, fireworks, martini glass.
安迪又回我符号了。圣诞树符，烟火符，马丁尼酒杯符。
Okay, that's it. I'm done.
够了，我受不了了。
Well, here he comes.
他来啦。
What is this supposed to mean?
你发这些是什么意思？
Oh, that? That means... I love emojis.
那些吗，就是这个意思。我爱死表情符号了。
I think my work here is done.
看来我可以功成身退了。
Max, I'm going to go with Jacob in that thing we wouldn't let take our grandmother.
麦克斯，我要进那台我们当初不愿意让其载走我奶奶的东西陪雅各布。
And I just wanted to say good-bye and thank you for everything.
我来跟你道别，并谢谢你对我们的一切。
Well, you built us a barn, we almost killed your friend-I'd say we're even.
你也帮我们盖了马棚，我们差点害死你朋友，也算两不相欠啦。

Well, Jacob says he's going to go home,
雅各布说他要回家了，
but I met this girl in the bar whose roommate overdosed yesterday,
但我在酒吧认识个女孩，她室友昨天嗑药过量死了，
so there's a spare room, and I've decided to stay. Cool.
所以家里有间空房，我打算去那里住。不错啊。
So got any words of wisdom for a kid trying to make it in the world?
有什么人生箴言能传授给我这个独自奋斗的小少年吗？
No, do you? Look, just know you're going to struggle for a while.
没，你呢？记住，刚开始肯定会有不顺遂
Someone's going to ask you what time it is,
可能有陌生人假装问你时间
and when you look at your watch, he's going to put his penis on you.
当你低头看表时，他就把阴茎蹭你身上。
But like Dan Savage says, it gets better.
但丹·萨维奇说过，明天会更好。
Although it hasn't for me, so maybe that only applies to questioning teens.
虽然我的明天没更好，那可能只对性向有疑问的青少年有效。
In short, there's really no point to anything,
总之，不必挂意不顺遂的人事物
but sometimes, you get to eat candy or have sex, and that's when it all feels right.
有时候，只要能吃上糖果或打上一炮，不顺遂也就抛之脑后了。
Oh, no. Caroline, the cat. I'm on my own. Fine.
惨了。卡洛琳，那只臭猫。见色忘友，行。
Oh, no, you bastard, not tonight. It is not going down tonight.
今晚别想吓唬我，死臭猫，别想。今晚我奉陪到底。
All right, you win this one.
好吧，今晚让你赢。