Wake up. It's Tuesday, and the DJ didn't come.
醒醒。今天是周二，而那个音乐主持没来。
Maybe he just drank too much.
或许他喝多了而已。
No! He didn't show at all. There's no DJ fresh-and-local in my ones and twos.
不是！他根本就没出现。没有当地新鲜的音乐主持来上我了。
Well, what did you expect? You ran out of there without even saying "hi." We should've stayed at the club.
你还想怎样呢？你连招呼都没打就落跑了。我们应该待在酒吧的。
Stop calling it a club!
别再说那里是酒吧！
He DJs at a supermarket, which is the lamest thing I've ever seen, not counting the time you tried to bring back the phrase "oh, no, you didn't."
他在超市打碟，这是我见过的最逊的事情了，但不算上你想把"哦，不，你不会的"这口头禅收回来的那事。
I'm surprised at you. What if I judged you for some of your jobs?
你真是让我惊讶。要是我对你的工作说三道四呢？
Uh, bar-back slash captain of a shrimp boat in the gulf of Mexico isn't the bomb?
呃，在墨西哥海湾的虾船上做服务员兼船长，这事你还没说够？
What about when you worked at the GAP?
那你在GAP服装店工作的那次呢？
Who told you about the GAP?
谁告诉你的？
You, that time you were drunk, folding a sweater, and you tried to help me "spring into summer" with cargo shorts.
你自己，喝醉酒叠毛衣的那次，然后你还想用短裤帮我"迎接夏天"。
Fine! I fell into the GAP.I needed the money.
好吧！我是被逼上贼船的，我需要钱。
Maybe Sebastian needs the money, too.
或许Sebastian也等着用钱。
Who?
谁？
And if you ever tell anyone about the gap, You will have a gap between your neck and where your head used to be.
要是你胆敢跟别人提起GAP服装店这事，那你脑袋和脖子就得分家了。
"oh, no you didn't."
"哦，不，你不会的".
Hey, I wasn't sure if it was too late to come by. But the Ouija board said, "go ahead, the girls are up!"
嘿，我不知道这么晚敲门好不好。但通灵板说 "放心去吧，她们没睡！"
You use that?
你用那玩意儿？

The only spirit I listen to is 2-buck-chuck, and he mostly tells me to take my top off.
我唯一信仰的就是便宜酒，而他大多是叫我脱掉上衣。
Yeah, Ouija helps me make all my big decisions.
通灵板帮我做重大决定。
Like coming to America, adopting a Chinese orphan, and leaving a Chinese orphan at the fire station.
比如来美国收养一个中国孤儿，把中国孤儿留在消防局。
Those boards are creepy. You never know what you're inviting in. I mean, what if we open a hellmouth?
那些通灵板很瘆人的。你都不知道招来了什么。我是说，万一打开了地狱之门呢？