Hello. Hey. As you just heard, my name is D-L Stewart, and I'm a faculty member here on campus at Colorado State University.
大家好。嘿。就如之前介绍的那样，我的名字叫D·L·斯图尔特。我是科罗拉多州立大学的一名教职员工。
But what's most important for you to understand about me right now is that I identify as both Black and as transgender, or trans.
但是此刻对于你们来说，关于我最重要的一点就是--我既是一名黑人，也是一名变性人。
And yes, I'm going to talk to you today about how Black trans lives matter.
那么今天我就要来讲讲，为什么非裔变性人的生命也很重要。
As I do so, I'm going to share a few scenes from my own life,
为了达到上述目的，我将分享给你们我生活的一些片段，
mixed in with the ways that race and gender have historically and currently intersected to shape the lives of Black trans people. Ready? Ready.
并且我将其杂糅在探讨种族和性别在历史上以及当代，是如何一步步地塑造非裔变性人的生活这一点的。准备好了吗？准备好了。
Scene one. I am at home with myself. My body, a sovereign country.
片段一。我独自一人在家。我的身体就是一个主权国家。
Sovereign meaning it is superlative in quality. Of the most exalted kind.
主权意味着一种最美好、最崇高的品质。
Having generalized curative powers of an unqualified nature,
它囊括了无止境的治愈型力量，
unmitigated, paramount, possessed of supreme power, unlimited in extent, absolute. Enjoying autonomy, independent, royal.
纯粹的、至尊的、拥有至高权力，当然，也不受限制。享受着自治、独立、高贵。
My body defies the restrictions of a society consumed by boxes and binaries and "are you a boy or a girl?"
我的身体抗拒着被条条框框和二元论束缚的社会，还有类似于“你是男生还是女生”这样无聊的问题。
Independent of such conventions, my body clings instead to the long ago lore that understood its magic. I contain multitudes.
不受这些惯例所约束，我的身体紧紧依附于古老的传说，懂得它神奇之处的传说。我海纳百川，包罗万象。
From this supreme power to name myself, define myself and be myself, I stake a claim to myself and organize my resistance.
得益于这种至高权力，我命名我自己，定义我自己，成为我自己。我对我自己宣告主权，从此开始了我的抗争。
A resistance that boldly proclaims that Black trans lives matter.
大胆宣告非裔变性人生命的重要性的抗争。
My body is a sovereign country and my first site of resistance. End scene.
我的身体是一个主权国家，也是我抗争的第一站。片段结束。
To say that Black trans lives matter is a claim to sovereignty.
强调非裔变性人生命的重要性也是对主权的宣告。
As much as Black Girl Magic, and #transisbrilliant, Black Trans Lives Matter is also a chorus of resistance.
就像是黑人女孩魔力和#变性人棒呆了一样，强调非裔变性人生命的重要性是一首有关抗争的合唱曲。
Because Black trans lives begin by defining our bodies as sovereign countries
因为它开始于我们定义自己身体为主权国家的那一瞬间。
from which we first begin to resist the messages that we have no place here.
也是从这时候开始，我们开始反抗那些声称我们在这里无立足之地的话语。
We push whole movements forward on the strength of our vision.
我们通过我们的视野推动了整个运动的进程。
We set trends and create new worlds. We are the vanguard. Black trans lives have always mattered.
我们引领趋势，创造全新的世界。我们是先锋队。非裔变性人的生命一直以来都是很重要的。
And yet, caught at the time-traveling intersection of Juneteenth emancipation celebration and Stonewall's emancipation declaration,
然而，就如同被困在六月解放日和石墙杰克逊解放宣言的十字路口间，
Black trans lives are both seen but yet unseen.
非裔变性人的存在虽已为人所知晓，却依然被忽视。
Unseen by the antiblackness of queer and trans movements. Unseen by the transphobia and trans-antagonism of Black movements.
被反黑人的同性恋和变性人运动所忽视。被患有跨性别恐惧症和反变性人的黑人运动所忽视。
Our sovereignty and resistance are blocked by layers of systems and structures
我们的主权和抵抗的信号被各种体制和结构的各种阶级所屏蔽，
that have always sought to contain, define and erase Black trans bodies.
他们总是寻找着遏制、定义和抹杀非裔变性人的方法。
Scene two. I am with my therapist.
片段二。我和我的心理治疗师在一起。
The one whose testimony I must rely on to declare me man enough to have my documents changed. The one who is to be believed.
我必须依靠她的证词来证明我是一个男人，才能更改我的档案。只有她会被信任。
Despite my own declarations that I am not this body, that this body is neither hers nor yours to define.
尽管我自己已声明我不属于这个身体，但这个身体也不能由她们，或者你们来定义。
I sit with this doctor. And she fills out a form for me.
我和这位医生坐在一起。她为我填写了一个表。
And when concerning what all I've done to affirm my gender, "Has the patient's gender presentation aligned with their gender identity?"
当谈到我为确认性别所做的一切，即“患者的性别表现是否与他们的性别认同相符？”
She decides that my gender presentation is more neutral, really.
她认为我的性别表现居然是，更偏向中性。
While I sit there, mind you, head to toe in clothing from the section of the store where the dress buttons go down the right side,
我坐在那里，请注意，我从头到脚都穿着商店里男装区的衣服，
and my pants give away the number of inches around my waist,
我的裤子比我的腰围大了好几英寸，
and my hair is cut like Denzel's "Man on Fire," but I'm still more neutral. Really?
甚至是我的发型也和《怒火救援》里的丹泽尔·华盛顿同款，但即使这样，我的性别表现依旧被认为是中性。不是吧？
Because she still sees, and you see, a Black woman.
因为她看到的依旧和你们所看到的一样，一个黑人女性。
And Black women's bodies are always already made genderless. End scene.
黑人女性的身体总是会弱化性别表现。片段结束。
From mammy and Sapphire, to Mandingo and Sambo, Black bodies and our genders have been caught in the white imagination.
从黑人保姆到萨菲尔，从曼丁哥人到混血黑人，黑人的身体和性别都只被限制在白人的想象里。
And the imagination of whiteness is fanciful, and powerful enough to turn its fancies into realities.
这种白人的想象天马行空，而且强大到可以把这种想象变成现实。
Imagined as a thing, we were made to become that thing, and so we have been bred like horses,
被想象成某物，我们就被迫成为某物，因此我们像马一样被培育；
fed like turtles to alligators, branded like cattle, milked like sows, made into oxen to plow.
像乌龟和鳄鱼一样被喂养；像牛一样被贴上标签；像母猪一样被牟利；像公牛一样去耕种。
Gender did not matter, so long as our body parts, our arms and legs and backs, our breasts and genitalia could be turned into profit.
性别不会变得重要，只要我们的身体部位，我们的胳膊、腿和后背；我们的乳房和生殖器依然有可能会被当作商品。
The Black body was made not white and therefore not worthy of gender.
黑人的身体生来就不是白色的，因此也不值得谈论性别。
And under the weight of the gentile tulle and virginal lace that dressed plantation mistresses, Black femininity has always been denied.
在用非犹太人的薄纱和清纯的蕾丝装扮自己的种植园女主人所带来的压力下，黑人女性的权利总是被剥夺。
Instead, she is either beast or porn star. Neither a proper gender, dehumanized.
取而代之的是，她要么是野兽，要么是艳星。既没有享有正确的性别，也没有享有人类的待遇。
Made a social threat that endangers civility. That puts civilization in danger.
被迫成为危害文明进程以及威胁社会一般的存在。
The angry Black woman cannot be escaped. Not even by a first lady of these United States.
愤怒的黑人女性无法逃离困境。甚至是美国的第一夫人也不例外。
Likewise, ill-suited for chivalry and outmatched as masters and captains of fate,
同样的，不合时宜的骑士精神，虽然他们成为了命运的主宰，
Black manhood lays flaccid in the hands of white man's dominance.
但黑人男性的气概在白人的主导下依旧不堪一击。
Body measurements taken, speed measured, draft pick forecasted. This is the NFL combine.
身体被测量，速度被检测，选秀被预测，这组成了美国国家橄榄球联盟。
Body measurements taken, teeth and body cavities inspected, number assigned. This is the prison intake room.
身体被测量，牙齿和身体的腔体被检查，数字被指定，这就是监狱牢房。
Body measurements taken, talents and abilities advertised, teeth and body cavities inspected, name and value assigned. This is a slave's bill of sale.
身体被测量，天赋和能力被谕知，牙齿和身体腔隙被检查，名字和价值被指定，这就是贩卖黑奴的账单。
Made either stud or farce, he is not for his own pleasure, but rather for profit and jest.
无论是当牛做马还是哗众取宠，他们不再属于自己，而是成为了赚钱的工具和笑柄。
Athletes and comics contained. Made not a threat.
运动员和喜剧演员也包括在内。他们不再是威胁。
"My gender is Black," said Hari Ziyad,
“我的性别是黑人。”哈里·齐亚德如是说。
because Black bodies and our genders have been caught in the white imagination, and we have always been transgressive.
因为黑人的身体和性别都被掌控在白人的想象中，而且我们一直都具有性别侵略性。
Transgressive meaning a violation of accepted and imposed boundaries of social acceptability. Blackness is transgressive.
性别侵略性的意思是，对社会可接受性的公认界限和强加界限的侵犯。黑人是具有性别侵略性的。

And once set free from social acceptability, blackness challenges the limitations of what gender can be.
一旦他们从社会可接受性中获得自由，黑人就会去挑战性别带来的限制。
We have always been fugitives here.
我们在这儿始终是逃亡者。
Escaping from gender surveillance to claim our sovereignty and right to exist and to live free,
从对性别的监视中逃离，奔向我们的主权，存在的权利和生活的自由。
to proclaim as beautiful that which was made ugly, to defy convention, Black lives and trans lives and Black trans lives.
我们可以赞颂之前被认为是丑陋事物的美丽，我们可以向传统发起挑战--非裔的生命，变性人的生命，还有非裔变性人的生命都很重要。
And yet, in this world, that fact that Black trans lives make a difference,
然而，在这个世界上，非裔变性人的存在带来了变化，
make differences and make a matter of mattering is doused by the fire hoses of past and current denials of our rights to exist and resist.
带来了改变，举足轻重的满腔热忱被过去和现在的否定所浇灭，被我们存在和抵抗的权利所浇灭。
We must fight to be seen as we see through fences into the play yards that we are kept out of.
我们必须努力抗争以赢得重视，因为我们只能透过重重围墙，才能看到那不允许我们接近的游乐场。
Scene three. I am at school. The bell rings, it's recess. We line up to go outside.
片段三。我在学校里。响铃了，到课间休息的时间了。我们排好队到外面去。
Those made boys on one side, those made girls on the other. We file out of the doors.
男生排在一侧，女生排在另一侧。我们鱼贯而出。
The boys stopping to fill in the closed off street. The girls and I, walking across the street.
男生们停下脚步，进入了一个无人的街道。女生们，还有我，穿过了街道。
"Keep your eyes straight ahead," we are told. Because there's a park across the street.
“目视前方。”我们被一再叮嘱。因为街道那边就有一个公园。
But there is a wrought iron fence that encloses that park. This is where the girls and I play.
但是却被锻铁栅栏围住了，我和女生们就在那里玩。
Mostly, I stand at the fence and watch,
大多数时候，我就站在栅栏边看着，
as my fellows play ball in the street and be loud and be rough and be sweaty, and I am behind the fence.
我的同伴们却在街上踢球，她们大声叫喊、粗犷豪迈、大汗淋漓，而我却被困在了栅栏后面。
Accused of thinking naughty thoughts. They have no idea. End scene.
他们因太淘气而被指责。他们一无所知。片段结束。
Sissified and bulldaggered, we are all made up.
温婉端庄或泼辣豪放，这就是我们。
Just boys in dresses and girls in suits, the Black transgressive body caught in fantasies of boxes and binaries
男生穿裙子也好，女生穿西装也罢，非裔变性人的身体，被条条框框所限制，
that make our genitalia representative of our gender, and our mannerisms our sexuality.
这些条条框框认为我们的生殖器代表了我们的性别，我们的风格和性欲。
Black trans lives are therefore written off as merely gay effeminate or lesbian butch.
非裔变性人因此被看成不过是娘娘腔男同，或者是大老粗女同。
And the overlay of femininity on bodies marked as male,
虽然外在是男性，当然也是人类的女性身体，
and therefore as man, adheres like a "kick me" sign, except the consequences are much more deadly.
就像是一个“踢我吧”标志一样，只不过它的后果更加致命。
The majority of trans people murdered in this country are Black trans women.
这个国家被谋杀的变性人中，大多数都是非裔女变性人。
Because when manhood is located between one's legs, and defined in opposition to womanhood,
因为男子气概仅由其双腿间的部位决定，没有该部位则是女性。
what's between one's legs cannot be seen as having anything in common with womanhood.
双腿间的部位，不应该和是否为女性挂钩。
And this same acidic wash serves to blanch trans masculinity, making it fade into nothingness.
这种酸性言论同样在腐蚀着变性人的男子气概，使其化为虚无。
Black trans men become illusions of manhood, women merely playing at being men because you can't get a real man.
非裔男变性人变成了男子气概的幻想，女人不能扮演男性角色，因为其不能成为真正的男人。
Forever put in our place, we are indelibly marked as "woman."
永远是这样，我们被当成女性的事实无法改变。
And at best, the looming threat of Black trans manhood is contained, inoculated, made more neutral, really.
最好的情况也不过是，有关黑变性人男子气概的紧迫威胁，被压制，被灌输，他们被迫成为中性。
Scene four. I am with my therapist.
片段四。我和我的心理治疗师在一起。
I tell her what I think about, as my body begins to slowly morph into another version of itself.
我告诉她我在想些什么，因为我的身体正在悄然发生变化。
What will happen as I move from the social threat of angry Black womanhood to the physical threat of looming Black manhood?
如果我刚逃离出社会对愤怒的黑人女性的威胁，却又被紧随其后的武力警告所胁迫，会发生什么呢？
When will my neighbors forget to recognize me and my pit bull?
我的邻居们什么时候才能忘记我和我的斗牛犬呢？
They've seen us nearly every day, predawn or after twilight, for what will have been over two years by then?
他们几乎每天都能见到我们，尤其是破晓时分或黄昏之后，这样子的两年过去了，之后会发生什么？
When and how soon after I am no longer misgendered woman will the cops be called to come and contain and erase my presence?
什么时候，还要多久，在我的性别不再是错误的女性之后，警察才会被召集过来，取消、更改我的身份呢？
How soon before the purse clutching, the sidewalk crossing?
我还要紧紧抓着我的手提包，走在这条人行道上多久？
What does it mean to become a brute? To turn my body into another kind of threat?
成为一个禽兽意味着什么呢？难道把我的身体转变成另一种威胁吗？
She's stunned that I'm already recognizing this. I can't afford not to. End scene.
心理咨询师发现我意识到这一点而感到惊讶。我并不想，但我必须如此。片段结束。
Who can see me and my Black trans kin in the skin we are in? Who dares to love us, who holds us close?
谁能透过我的肤色真正看到我和我的变性人群体？谁有勇气能够爱我们？谁会和我们紧紧相拥？
To whom do we matter other than to ourselves?
我们会有机会找到一个爱他更甚于自己的那个人呢？
We're not looking for saviors. We have each other.
我们不是在寻找救世主。我们拥有彼此。
As Lilla Watson said, "If you have come here to help me, you are wasting your time.
就像是莉拉·沃森所说的那样，“如果你来这帮助我，你是在浪费时间。
But if you have come because you recognize your liberation is bound up in mine, then let us work together."
但是如果你来是因为你意识到了，你我的自由休戚相关，那么，就让我们并肩作战吧！”
Let us work together to make Black trans lives matter. The lived experience of Black trans people out into the world.
让我们并肩作战，努力让非裔变性人的生命变得重要，让非裔变性人的人生经历影响到全世界。
And if you believe that your liberation is bound up with mine,
如果你相信，你我的自由休戚相关，
then I invite you to make Black Trans Lives Matter your personal ethic by being transformative, loudly and mindfully.
那么我将邀请你，把非裔变性人生命的重要性上升为你的个人道德准则，只要你能勇敢谨慎地变通。
You can do that in three ways. Transform your thinking about blackness and gender.
你可以通过三种方式来这样做。改变你关于黑人和性别的看法。
Be loud by taking the risk to confront false assumptions and other's fears and biases.
勇敢冒险，去面对错误的想法以及他人的恐惧和偏见。
Be mindful and pay attention and believe what Black trans people say about our own lives.
小心谨慎，相信非裔变性人关于自己生命的话语。
Being transformative loudly and mindfully takes practice. Just like getting someone's pronouns right.
勇敢谨慎地变通，多做尝试。就像是正确说出某人的代词。
Mine are they, them, their, and he, him, his, by the way.
顺便提一句，我的人称代词是“他们、他们的、他、他的”。
And getting someone's pronouns right and being transformative loudly and mindfully matters.
正确说出人称代词，还有勇敢谨慎地变通都是很重要的。
Because Black trans lives matter. My life matters. My body is a sovereign country, and my first site of resistance.
因为非裔变性人的生命的确很重要。我的生命很重要。我的身体是一个主权国家，也是我抗争的第一站。