I shuddered as he spoke: I felt his influence in my marrow -- his hold on my limbs.

他说话的时候我颤抖着。我感觉到他的影响透入我骨髓——他捆住了我的手脚。

"Seek one elsewhere than in me, St. John: seek one fitted to you."

“别在我身上动脑筋了，到别的地方找一个吧，圣·约翰。找一个适合你的。”

"One fitted to my purpose, you mean -- fitted to my vocation.

“你的意思是一个适合我目标的——适合我天职的。

Again I tell you it is not the insignificant private individual -- the mere man, with the man's selfish senses --

我再次告诉你，我不是作为微不足道的个人——一个带着自私自利观念的男人，

I wish to mate: it is the missionary."

而希望结婚的，却是作为一个传教士。”

"And I will give the missionary my energies -- it is all he wants --

“我会把我的精力献给传教士——他所需要的就是这个——

but not myself: that would be only adding the husk and shell to the kernel.

而不是我本人。我对于他来说，无非等于是把果壳加到果仁上，

For them he has no use: I retain them."

而他并不需要果壳一类的东西：我要把它们保留着。”

"You cannot -- you ought not.

“你不能——也不应该。

Do you think God will be satisfied with half an oblation?

你想上帝会对半心半意的献身表示满意吗？

Will He accept a mutilated sacrifice?

他会接受部份的牺牲吗？

It is the cause of God I advocate: it is under His standard I enlist you.

我所拥护的是上帝的事业，我是把你招募到他的旗帜下的。

I cannot accept on His behalf a divided allegiance: it must be entire."

我不能代表上帝接受三心二意的忠诚，非得死心塌地不可。”

"Oh! I will give my heart to God," I said.

“呵！我会把我的心交给上帝，”我说，

"You do not want it."

“你并不需要它。”

I will not swear, reader, that there was not something of repressed sarcasm both in the tone in which I uttered this sentence, and in the feeling that accompanied it.

读者呵，我不能保证我说这句话的语气和伴随着的感情里，有没有一种克制的嘲弄。

I had silently feared St. John till now, because I had not understood him.

我向来默默地惧怕圣·约翰，因为我不了解他。

He had held me in awe, because he had held me in doubt.

他使我感到敬畏，因为总能让我吃不准。

How much of him was saint, how much mortal, I could not heretofore tell:

他身上有多少属于圣人，有多少属于凡人，我一直难以分辨。

but revelations were being made in this conference: the analysis of his nature was proceeding before my eyes.

但这次谈话却给了我启示，在我眼皮底下展开着对他本性的剖析。

I saw his fallibilities: I comprehended them.

我看到了他的错误，并有所理解。

I understood that, sitting there where I did, on the bank of heath, and with that handsome form before me, I sat at the feet of a man, caring as I.

我明白，我坐在欧石南岸边那个漂亮的身躯后面时，我是坐在一个同我一样有错的男人跟前。